Originally Posted By: RazorsEdge
Well folks,theres nothing in the world I love to do more,then to help someone in need. I for the last 2-months have been helping a friend back on her feet financially and trying to get her back on her feet. Well I just have one problem and that is she does Meth. Yup I've tried like [censored] to be supportive but thats something in my life I have no tolerance for.
I've been trying to help her,but she refuses to get a job. I'm just exhausted and want to walk away. It's gonna hurt like [censored] but she doesnt want treatment and I dont know what else I can do.
You are making the right choice, for both of your good. However, you need to consider the possibility you have some codependency issues of your own that will need some attention. That’s not an insult or a criticism. It’s not even an observation based on much more than a hunch. But it comes from someone who knows all about codependence and how it can negatively affect those who deal with it without ever recognizing or affirming it.
Something like Al-anon is a good place to learn about how codependency can manifest itself, so you should give some thought to that.
No matter what, you must remember this: the most dangerous thing in the world is an addiction that feels threatened. And yes, I said addiction, not addict. For whether because of the things you do to try to help her (whether ahe sees them as help or not), or because of sudden, drastic situations she encounters (arrest, car accident, etc.), once her addiction realizes it is in danger of being eliminated (even if temporarily), it will lash out and cause her to do things you never thought she would be capable of.
Insults, violence, and yes, even criminally abhirant behavior will all be on the table once she is either forced or tries to get sober. You’ll need to be orepared for that in case it happens. It’s ugly and hurtful and will make you wonder what happened to the person you knew, but that’s the death knell if any well entrenched addiction. It won’t go quietly and will look to take others with it...including you if possible.
Good luck, I wish you the best for this.
Nuke