Erased...
- Thread starter Shannow
- Start date
Today is now 2 years since I spent time with and spoke to my son...add another 2-1/2 months for daughter. Year and a half of horrific accusations, and 5 threats of violence orders.
There are hundreds of thousands of reasons that Australia Women practice alienation, and they typically all have a $ sign in front of them...and sheer malice to top it off.
Learned that the kids knew months before they moved out that they were going to, the alienation was so well practiced. Learned that the "plan" was for me to follow my father's footsteps.
Moving on, divorced, property settlement near closed, and remarrying...have to accept that being a Dad was something that I used to be.
There are hundreds of thousands of reasons that Australia Women practice alienation, and they typically all have a $ sign in front of them...and sheer malice to top it off.
Learned that the kids knew months before they moved out that they were going to, the alienation was so well practiced. Learned that the "plan" was for me to follow my father's footsteps.
Moving on, divorced, property settlement near closed, and remarrying...have to accept that being a Dad was something that I used to be.
I'm so sorry to hear you are still cut off from your kids and that the idea was for you to go through what your father did. That's just beyond messed up.
I am glad you have found a way to move on and have good things to look forward to.
I am glad you have found a way to move on and have good things to look forward to.
The kids had a choice. They chose poorly, coerced by pressure and lies.
I hope that they come to regret that choice, and that you become "Dad" once again.
It's the best role I've ever had, and I know it's a role you're both suited for and deserve.
A good friend went through similar alienation after resigning his seniority at United Airlines. Gave up his whole career to be a full time father. The boys' mother manipulated them into abandoning him. The boys moved out, broke contact, and didn't come back until it was time to pay for university. He's reconciled with one of them, not both, not yet.
It's been about a decade.
Marathon. Not sprint.
In the meantime - remarrying? Congratulations! Well-deserved chance for happiness there.
Cheers, Mate.
Shannow, I feel your pain. 4 years now for my daughter. I had to move for work, and her mother and mother's sister worked on her for years and she doesn't want anything to do with me now. It's a shame that some women are like that, viewing the child (victim) as property to be coveted or used as a bargaining chip.
There's light at the end of the tunnel though. I've spoken to numerous people that were either the parent or child in our situation. They have all said that by the mid-20s, the children will come looking for you. So, like Astro said, it's a marathon not a sprint.
Stay the course...be you. They'll come looking.
I had "The Divorce From Hawaii From Hell", to quote the California Court clerk (yes, the ex was divorcing me in two states at the same time). Separating from the military soon to have no job, negative cash flow real estate I couldn't sell, protective order, etc., etc. Limited contact with my kids. Owed lawyers more than i could ever expect to pay. Came very close to bankruptcy. Things were dark.
Six years later. Younger, smarter, loving new wife. Good job. Paid off lawyers (soon thereafter). Cash flow good. Kids living with us soon as they turned 18 if not away at school. Life was good.
It didn't feel like it at the time, but the nicest thing my ex ever did for me was the divorce.
Six years later. Younger, smarter, loving new wife. Good job. Paid off lawyers (soon thereafter). Cash flow good. Kids living with us soon as they turned 18 if not away at school. Life was good.
It didn't feel like it at the time, but the nicest thing my ex ever did for me was the divorce.
Have not seen my daughter in 25 years, saw my son for the first time in 24 years last summer. Poison seems to last forever when it keeps being applied.
Hope you all have bright futures.
Smoky
Hope you all have bright futures.
Smoky
Tough to read. Plenty of life in front of you, Shannow. Your kids might just grow, gain wisdom, and circle back to you. Carry on, brother.
wemay
Site Donor 2023
Hey Shannow
I can only imagine your pain since only those going through it have a true understanding. But even just imagining losing my Son brings great anxiety and sadness. I know for a fact I'd need to find a support group. Would you consider doing the same?
Your entry above, "it's over..." is scary. PLEASE pm me if you need to reach out to anyone who'd listen. Really Listen; i will. Any day and/or time.
I can only imagine your pain since only those going through it have a true understanding. But even just imagining losing my Son brings great anxiety and sadness. I know for a fact I'd need to find a support group. Would you consider doing the same?
Your entry above, "it's over..." is scary. PLEASE pm me if you need to reach out to anyone who'd listen. Really Listen; i will. Any day and/or time.
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I can't even imagine. Just moving out and then no more. Wow. Look to the future, one step at a time. Hang in there mate.
I hadn't thought of it at first, but I hope even more than my previous post's hopes that "it's over" means the erasure is over and perhaps you've got contact with your kids back. Hoping the best for you buddy.
Smoky14, that is awful - absolutely heartbreaking to hear - so very sorry.
This does make me thankful for the good things in my life.
Hey all...no, not that...although she told friends that was her desired outcome through the entire process.
As of yesterday, I have no incling of where the kids are, nor any means of contact...last time I saw their faces, or heard their voices was two years ago in the mall....
As of yesterday, I have no incling of where the kids are, nor any means of contact...last time I saw their faces, or heard their voices was two years ago in the mall....
Hey Shannow - glad you’re able to post now and then, even if the news isn’t good, we all like knowing that you're still with us.
My heart aches for you, my friend, it truly does.
I know you’ve been busy with work, and that you’ve been promoted, but, when life settles down a bit for you, and you have the time to come visit the US, or I when get to Australia, dinner/beers are on me.
Cheers, Mate.
My heart aches for you, my friend, it truly does.
I know you’ve been busy with work, and that you’ve been promoted, but, when life settles down a bit for you, and you have the time to come visit the US, or I when get to Australia, dinner/beers are on me.
Cheers, Mate.
