So, I was conceived through artificial insemination, with the donor being anonymous. My parents tried to have kids but couldn't (they were married in 1973, I was born in '79), so they finally decided to try the route of using a sperm donor. Artificial insemination wasn't new at that time (in fact, I suspect it's been done, if even in crude fashion, for a long, long time in one form or another), however, it wasn't very tightly regulated then, like it is now.
My mom heard about the fertility doctor through word of mouth, and went to see him. From what my mom has told me, he was known as somewhat of a maverick around town, and liked to do things his own way. Unfortunately he died a few years ago, closing off a potential course of research for me. The way it worked was, the donor provided the sperm, and my mother was called to come to the doctor's office immediately for the procedure to be performed. My conception and subsequent birth was Mom's 2nd attempt; the first ended in miscarriage.
All I know about the donor is what I've been told by my mother, which is, in turn, what the doc told her, which is that the donor was a resident physician at a local hospital. Apparently, professional, highly-educated people were, and still are, today, used as donors more often than not, for reasons that are obvious. Medical students are a natural choice - they're interested in the science of it, and spend a lot of time at the hospital, where the "donation" would be facilitated. Let's say he was ~ 26 years old in 1979 - you can do the math - that makes him around his early to mid 60s today, if he's still living.
My "Dad", who raised me (not sure what technical term to use for him - I guess you could say he adopted me) passed away in 2002.
It's a dream of mine to make contact with my biological father. I think it would be so cool to meet him and see what he's like. It's also very possible that I could have half-siblings, if he has kids of his own. Not only that, but I could potentially have MANY half-siblings out there, depending on how prolific a sperm donor he was. I think it would be the coolest thing in the world to get to meet family members I never knew I had, especially since we have a very small family, and practically no one in our family (except my 1st cousin) enjoys the things I do (distance running, bicycling, motorcycles, working on cars and bikes and airplanes, etc.). It would be fascinating to me if I were to meet my biological father and/or half-siblings, and they were interested in some of the same things. I'm well aware of the possibility that that might NOT happen, but, if it did, and it was like, "click"...THESE are my people...they're into all the same stuff I am... How neat would that be?
So, last December, I decided to join the DSR (Donor Sibling Registry), which is a registry with the purpose of connecting donor offspring with their donors, and/or half-siblings. No results yet, but I'm hopeful that something might come of it one day. There are many success stories posted there. My hope is that the donor would hear about it, want to make contact with potential offspring, and join (there is a cost to join). Or, it's possible that a half-sibling who's also aware of his or her origin could join and find my posting (which includes the city where the procedure was performed and the doctor's name).
When my mom and dad chose this course of action to have kids, the plan was for me (and, later, my younger half-sister) never to find out about our origins. But, family secrets have a way of getting out, and, eventually, my sister and I found out.
There are all sorts of possibilities with this. I'm sure there are many I haven't even considered. For example, it's possible that my donor may not want to establish contact. There are many reasons for this - I'm sure you can think of some, yourself. My hope is that he shares my intense curiosity, and that, one day, it gets the best of him.
I recently decided to have my DNA analyzed by 23andMe, for obvious reasons. It only took 1 month to receive the report from the time that I ordered the saliva kit. I got the results back earlier this week, and it is fascinating. 23andMe has identified over 1500 of their members who are 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, and more distant, cousins of mine. Many even share segments - in a few cases, multiple segments - of identical DNA, meaning that we both inherited those DNA segments from a common ancestor. There's also a feature that, for every match shown, lists common matches (people that we are both related to), as long as I have enabled sharing of that information, and the other individual has, as well. Something else that's cool is that I can list my family surnames, and I can set my profile to allow others to see those surnames, as can they, with their own profiles. I've already found at least one person who listed my mother's maiden name as one of her family surnames. You can also send people messages, and I've already messaged my top 5 matches - my 5 closest relatives. Haven't heard back from any of them yet, though.
Something else that is extremely fascinating to me about the 23andMe report is that it provides maternal and paternal haplogroups (I've always been interested in human genetics and anthropology, migration, origins of people groups, etc.). It is showing my maternal haplogroup, derived from mtDna (mitochondrial DNA), to be "V", which is one of the more rare maternal haplogroups - found in highest concentration among the Saami people of northern Scandinavia (59%) and, perhaps even more interesting, the Basques of northern Spain and southern France (10%), whose language is not really related to any other modern language. My paternal haplogroup is R1b1b2a1a1d, a sub-clade of R1b1b2, which is apparently very common in Western Europe and the British Isles, as well as here in North America, due to immigration. What I can derive from these haplogroups, as far as my tendencies, preferences, predisposition to any inherited disorder or communicable disease, etc, (if anything) is very interesting.
Any genetics/anthropology buffs here?
One thing I've wondered about is obtaining a list of the men who were resident physicians at the hospital at that time. I might be able to track him down that way.
So, a few questions for y'all. Did any of you ever donate sperm? Were you ever asked to? I know there are a lot of guys who are in their 50s and 60s, married, with kids, on BITOG. Imagine that you donated sperm for the purpose of artificial insemination, when you were in your 20s, before you ever got married and had kids. How would you feel about establishing a relationship of any degree, with your donor offspring? Why would you be open to it, or, if you wouldn't be, then, why not? I'm just brainstorming here.
If anyone has any ideas about how I could go about finding my donor or potential half-siblings, please post up.
I'd also love to hear from any of you who have similar stories to mine, or, if you are the parent of a donor-conceived child.
My mom heard about the fertility doctor through word of mouth, and went to see him. From what my mom has told me, he was known as somewhat of a maverick around town, and liked to do things his own way. Unfortunately he died a few years ago, closing off a potential course of research for me. The way it worked was, the donor provided the sperm, and my mother was called to come to the doctor's office immediately for the procedure to be performed. My conception and subsequent birth was Mom's 2nd attempt; the first ended in miscarriage.
All I know about the donor is what I've been told by my mother, which is, in turn, what the doc told her, which is that the donor was a resident physician at a local hospital. Apparently, professional, highly-educated people were, and still are, today, used as donors more often than not, for reasons that are obvious. Medical students are a natural choice - they're interested in the science of it, and spend a lot of time at the hospital, where the "donation" would be facilitated. Let's say he was ~ 26 years old in 1979 - you can do the math - that makes him around his early to mid 60s today, if he's still living.
My "Dad", who raised me (not sure what technical term to use for him - I guess you could say he adopted me) passed away in 2002.
It's a dream of mine to make contact with my biological father. I think it would be so cool to meet him and see what he's like. It's also very possible that I could have half-siblings, if he has kids of his own. Not only that, but I could potentially have MANY half-siblings out there, depending on how prolific a sperm donor he was. I think it would be the coolest thing in the world to get to meet family members I never knew I had, especially since we have a very small family, and practically no one in our family (except my 1st cousin) enjoys the things I do (distance running, bicycling, motorcycles, working on cars and bikes and airplanes, etc.). It would be fascinating to me if I were to meet my biological father and/or half-siblings, and they were interested in some of the same things. I'm well aware of the possibility that that might NOT happen, but, if it did, and it was like, "click"...THESE are my people...they're into all the same stuff I am... How neat would that be?
So, last December, I decided to join the DSR (Donor Sibling Registry), which is a registry with the purpose of connecting donor offspring with their donors, and/or half-siblings. No results yet, but I'm hopeful that something might come of it one day. There are many success stories posted there. My hope is that the donor would hear about it, want to make contact with potential offspring, and join (there is a cost to join). Or, it's possible that a half-sibling who's also aware of his or her origin could join and find my posting (which includes the city where the procedure was performed and the doctor's name).
When my mom and dad chose this course of action to have kids, the plan was for me (and, later, my younger half-sister) never to find out about our origins. But, family secrets have a way of getting out, and, eventually, my sister and I found out.
There are all sorts of possibilities with this. I'm sure there are many I haven't even considered. For example, it's possible that my donor may not want to establish contact. There are many reasons for this - I'm sure you can think of some, yourself. My hope is that he shares my intense curiosity, and that, one day, it gets the best of him.
I recently decided to have my DNA analyzed by 23andMe, for obvious reasons. It only took 1 month to receive the report from the time that I ordered the saliva kit. I got the results back earlier this week, and it is fascinating. 23andMe has identified over 1500 of their members who are 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, and more distant, cousins of mine. Many even share segments - in a few cases, multiple segments - of identical DNA, meaning that we both inherited those DNA segments from a common ancestor. There's also a feature that, for every match shown, lists common matches (people that we are both related to), as long as I have enabled sharing of that information, and the other individual has, as well. Something else that's cool is that I can list my family surnames, and I can set my profile to allow others to see those surnames, as can they, with their own profiles. I've already found at least one person who listed my mother's maiden name as one of her family surnames. You can also send people messages, and I've already messaged my top 5 matches - my 5 closest relatives. Haven't heard back from any of them yet, though.
Something else that is extremely fascinating to me about the 23andMe report is that it provides maternal and paternal haplogroups (I've always been interested in human genetics and anthropology, migration, origins of people groups, etc.). It is showing my maternal haplogroup, derived from mtDna (mitochondrial DNA), to be "V", which is one of the more rare maternal haplogroups - found in highest concentration among the Saami people of northern Scandinavia (59%) and, perhaps even more interesting, the Basques of northern Spain and southern France (10%), whose language is not really related to any other modern language. My paternal haplogroup is R1b1b2a1a1d, a sub-clade of R1b1b2, which is apparently very common in Western Europe and the British Isles, as well as here in North America, due to immigration. What I can derive from these haplogroups, as far as my tendencies, preferences, predisposition to any inherited disorder or communicable disease, etc, (if anything) is very interesting.
Any genetics/anthropology buffs here?
One thing I've wondered about is obtaining a list of the men who were resident physicians at the hospital at that time. I might be able to track him down that way.
So, a few questions for y'all. Did any of you ever donate sperm? Were you ever asked to? I know there are a lot of guys who are in their 50s and 60s, married, with kids, on BITOG. Imagine that you donated sperm for the purpose of artificial insemination, when you were in your 20s, before you ever got married and had kids. How would you feel about establishing a relationship of any degree, with your donor offspring? Why would you be open to it, or, if you wouldn't be, then, why not? I'm just brainstorming here.
If anyone has any ideas about how I could go about finding my donor or potential half-siblings, please post up.
I'd also love to hear from any of you who have similar stories to mine, or, if you are the parent of a donor-conceived child.