wife wants to trade in her car

[Oldmoparguy1]

Originally Posted By: JHZR2
I see this as a continued disfunctional relationship. She doesnt want the focus? Well she works at McDonalds (correct me if Im wrong) and you have two kids. She doesnt have much of a choice.

You say the payment is only $12 more, but for how much longer? You say the PT is nearly paid off. So youll take a sale hit on the PT, and then keep paying $12 more for how long?

Why not disclose the actual terms and total deal for the Accord if you want honest opinions?

If your situation was different, Id think it would be a smart move, even if debt was involved. I dont think youll get much higher MPGs, or that anything will be much better just because you buy a magic Honda. And the delta in acquisition cost (youre putting another $11k out of pocket, plus interest, on a higher mileage car) would pay for a LOT of repairs on the PT.

Youre in a relationship together and for your kids. You need to make the best composite decision, not just spend money on a whim because she doesnt like something. Especially since, no offense, but I dont trust that the relationship will last. I hope and pray that it will, but if you and she have tempers and youre not on the same page with stuff, even like this, then there may be a difficult road. And if you end up getting divorced, Id hate for you to be on the hook for part of the payment on two cars, even if its "only $12 more".

+1

Excellent advice. PM me. We should talk..

Wayne

 

[gathermewool]

Originally Posted By: ram_man
Originally Posted By: gathermewool
Originally Posted By: JHZR2
You already have a payment on a used car. You're looking to get a higher payment on an even more used car.

Glad to see you're back together, if at least for the kids. But iirc, she works at McDonald's and you're changing jobs.

I thnk a $3k beater is in order, after all, you have a new, reliable car. When you can pay cash and the car is no more than half your combined salary, then go for it.

Even if not for the debt, seems there are too many unknowns currently. Ultimately maybe it's a good idea, but if have her qualify and have the loan fully on her own. But right now I wouldn't.


Good advice.

If you're still making payments on an 11 year-old vehicle that holds value like a sieve, then you are not financially able to buy a newer car. Pay off the PT and save up for a better used car that you can afford.

NOTHING is worse for a relationship than financial issues. Having a car payment that takes away from other things you might like to do isn't healthy.


Ehhh shea only owned it for about a year. We had 3yrs to pay but have already almost paid it off completely. She jumped the gun when she bought it and rushed into it . Our payment however won't be but 12 more per month. That's something I can live with.


Yea, but for HOW MANY MORE MONTHS? Sorry for the CAPS - I'll eat my hat if the Accord is only $12 more per month for the same duration as your current loan on the PT.

If not, pay off the PT and drive it until it dies. You want her to be happy, but you don't want her to be broke, do you? When you pay off the PT, put part of that money you were using for the payment toward savings for a newer car or repairs, and maybe use the rest to save for a second honeymoon, a cheap, but needed getaway.

 

[Nick1994]

Originally Posted By: daves87rs
Is this even a question?


Bye Bye PT.......


Yes!

DUMP THE PT!

 

[Vikas]

Originally Posted By: Oldmoparguy1
Originally Posted By: ram_man
I offered her my focus who doesn't want it
R-M, cars are not your problem. I've been married for 47 years, my parents were married for 50 years. If you want some (free) advice Pm me and I'll send you my ph#. I just hate to see young people go down this road.

Good luck,

Wayne
Come on, even though I have been married for over 25 years, I could still use your advice Seriously, spill your wisdom here rather than going PM route.

 

[mjk]

Dangle a carrot in front of her. If she does work at a McDonalds, ask her to get into a management training program there. Then, if successful, look into a different vehicle.

This idea of new toys, making a marriage 'easier', is very short sighted.

 

[01rangerxl]

Originally Posted By: JHZR2
I see this as a continued disfunctional relationship. She doesnt want the focus? Well she works at McDonalds (correct me if Im wrong) and you have two kids. She doesnt have much of a choice.


Kind of a mind blowing sense of entitlement.

Beggars can't shouldn't be choosers.

 

[KrisZ]

Originally Posted By: 01rangerxl

I see this as a continued disfunctional relationship. She doesnt want the focus? Well she works at McDonalds (correct me if Im wrong) and you have two kids. She doesnt have much of a choice.


Excellent point.
I don't mean any disrespect to OP's wife, but a lot of women, start thinking of an "exit strategy" when their relationships hit some pot holes. Some men probably do that too, but in general we are far too short sighted when it comes to relationships. Perhaps she just wants to set herself up for when things "don't work out".

 

[JHZR2]

But we do need to be careful. OP may have a temper, and we don't want any "jaw jacking" incidents.

That's why I think it's cleanest if he goes off the basis of having just bought a new car and so he can't qualify. So go to a bank and see if she can qualify by herself. Chances are no. Then he's the nice guy offering the focus (offer it by txt or email so you have a paper trail), and if she says no... Oh well then.

 

[Mr Nice]

Originally Posted By: rjundi
IMHO you should give your wife the new car and you drive/fix PT cruiser as needed. Warranties are not needed when you can fix vehicles.

I will only say wife/I make into the 6 figures and still own vehicles with 150k+ miles and newest is 2007. We CAN'T afford a new car and are debt free except for a mortgage where we own 50% equity in home.


What do you say if your wife tells you she wants a new car ?

 

[Mr Nice]

I agree with JHZR2

 

[ram_man]

Hold on now some of you are jumping to conclusions . She is a manager for Mc Donalds she's on step away from having her own store so she is now making OK money. Not a minimum wage monkey (no offense) she doesn't feel comfortable driving the focus she has a hard time backing it up. Her drive to work is 1 mile mine is a lot farther that's why I have the new car. She wants a Honda she loves them for whatever reason. Buying the accord isnt a way to make her happy as much as it is a decent price and it is the car she wants and has wanted. The pt cruiser isn't a very good car so she wants out. She owes about 400 bucks on it. I agree with the idea keep it in some ways but if she doesn't like it and it is showing signs of issues. I think the notion is at least worth considering and discussing. Their is valid points on both sides.

 

[surfstar]

The goal isn't to continue to make car payments every month.

The new car feeling subsides after a few months. Then she will feel relatively the same way about that Accord. If something goes wrong with that car while making payments - then guess what? "I should have kept the PT, at least it was paid for"

Ask her to wait until the new year, see what its like to not have to make that monthly payment.

 

[Bladecutter]

Originally Posted By: ram_man
she doesn't feel comfortable driving the focus she has a hard time backing it up.


How is the Accord, which is a bigger car than the Focus, easier to back up?
Both vehicles should be about the same for amount of effort needed in driving.

Ultimately, who's paycheck is the vehicle payment coming out of?
If it's from her paycheck, you should just stand back, and let her do her thing.

If it's from your paycheck, if all she really owes on the PT Cruiser is ~$400, then it's up to you how much money you're about to flush down the toilet on the PT by trading it in. At the very least, sell it yourself, and make an additional thousand or so dollars that you would have lost by trading it in.

Let's put it this way, you've got the easier side of the issue.

My wife also has a PT Cruiser, loves it, and won't get rid of it to save her soul.
She also has her Fiat 500 Abarth, loves it, and it's her daily driver, when she drives herself to work. Currently we work 3 miles apart, so I just drop her off in the morning, and pick her up at night.

My issue is that we're currently going back and forth on what our next car is going to be. She wants a Maserati Ghibli, or an Alfa Romeo 4C, and I want a Porsche Cayman. Be grateful this isn't the type of car your wife is looking for.

BC.

 

[rjundi]

A 6 year old 90k Accord is not a unicorn. Its a top selling car so plenty more out there when you actually need a different car.

There is a nice feeling making no payments and being able to save or spend money on yourself or family. Maybe sample that for a bit? Remember being rash may have led her to getting the PT Cruiser that turned out not to be what she wanted.

 

[surfstar]

http://online.wsj.com/articles/can-money-buy-happiness-heres-what-science-has-to-say-1415569538

Read that. Please.

Some snippets:
"It’s this process of “hedonic adaptation” that makes it so hard to buy happiness through material purchases. The new dress or the fancy car provides a brief thrill, but we soon come to take it for granted."

"Some studies, meanwhile, have shown that debt has a detrimental effect on happiness, while savings and financial security tend to boost it. A survey of British households found that those with higher levels of debt reported lower happiness, and a separate piece of research on married couples showed that those in more debt had more marital conflict."


A new car and payment, does NOT equal a happy wife and life. That debt is more likely to drag on your "fixed/repaired" relationship than keeping a paid off, unwanted car.

 

[OVERKILL]

Originally Posted By: ram_man
She owes about 400 bucks on it.


I am confused. If she owes $400 on the PT, how the heck are we even talking about "payments" here and it being "more" with the Accord. You should be able to pay that off no problem; you should be able to own it outright tomorrow given that paltry amount.

Knowing that, I find the thought of getting yourself another 11K in debt for another used car with higher mileage making a lot less sense than it appeared to at the beginning of this thread. I assumed you still owed a fair bit on the PT and you were just trading payments for more payments, for a longer duration with a bit more on top. But that's really not the case given the amount owing on the PT.

 

[exranger06]

Originally Posted By: ram_man
Her drive to work is 1 mile mine is a lot farther that's why I have the new car.

Her work is only a mile away? What does she even need a car for? That's a 15 minute walk, or a 5 minute bicycle ride. I can't imagine spending thousands of dollars more than you have to for that kind of use.

If she absolutely needs a car, pay off the PT Cruiser and have her use that. It's not like she spends hours per day driving it. I think she can tough it out driving an ugly/uncomfortable car for a lousy 5 minutes/1 mile. Reliability shouldn't be that big of a concern either. If it breaks down, it's only a ten minute walk back home or the rest of the way to work. It's not like she'll be stranded in the middle of the desert.

 

[barkingspider]

Pull the trigger on the Honda for sure

 

[Clevy]

First world problems eh?


K. So we are discussing a car purchase and said car gets driven minimal miles daily,and being bought for a woman who has already shown to be unhappy and has already left once leaving ram man in a financial mess and he started threads about how she consumes but doesn't replace when "trying to work it out" the last time.
Call me a cynic but I think this isn't just about a car.
Now let's look at this from a step or 2 back.
New job,wife has already shown treachery so let's go 10 grand in the hole for a car with more miles that gets driven 2 miles a day for work.
That's the end and all I need to know already. Who cares about comfort or if she likes the car. Does she prefer walking?
Next let's consider the extra payment vs fixing a paid off car. No brainer in my mind.
So fiscally its a dumb move and who says she is even staying. I've seen guys try to make up for mistakes and they get themselves into a whole lot of debt for the woman to leave the moment she's given a reason,I see this as the same thing.
What's best for a family with 2 kids isn't going further into debt,especially when the current vehicle isnt a liability.
Re-visit this car idea in another year,if she hasn't left you again.

 

[ram_man]

She drives other places jeeez . She does all the grocery shopping all the errands kid related things ect. And when she goes to visit her brother or dad it's a couple hour drive. I was just stating my day to day travel is more than hers. That's all! And I bought my car and her job would be paying for hers. The pt cruiser could be paid off tomorrow if I wanted to just have to no real reason . If she ends up doing it I may pay it off then. Is just in the discussion stages and what not. I agree financially a paid off car is better. But if she hates it and wants something else and its her money why not? When we got the pt I pulled the trigger I was under the assumption we both liked it but apparently not so this time I'll let her do what she wants with no input other than yep its mechanically solid and then if she ends up not liking it she can't say it was my idea. And from my prospective the pt has some transmission morning sickness and burns oil eventually it's going to require my time and effort to fix it. And as I said earlier I do it all day everyday I have no desire to come home and work on that thing. Atleast the Honda isn't a bear to work on. So to recap the pt has some questionable issues and she doesnt like it the Honda will have a payment for 3 yrs but has a 2yr. 150k warranty has roadside assistance and has no issues.
I'll be honest overall I dont care if she keeps the pt and I end up having to replace the trans. The so be it i would rather not but either way whatever. I like the Honda more but I rarely will be driving it so none of it matters to me. If she's paying for it and she's driving it and I don't have to work on it then I'm happy. Some of the judgmental folks on here do amaze me. If any one of you would like to judge my financial situation why do you start paying my bills or hers? I have a decent job I have a savings a college fund and retirement so I fail to see the big issue with going inot a relatively small amount of debt for peace of mind and personal want.