what % of labor should a person that asks for help put in

[John105]

Way too many variables for a blanket statement. Over the years I have been used up and rarely has anyone ever reciprocated 100% of what I did for them. Some friends I dont mind, others I ignore. Its a skill you develop over years and like many lessons in life the painful ones are the ones you learn the best.

One thing that even I never saw--my buddy moved to SC, and his house in FLA was unsold for more than 6 mos.

He said everyone including direct relatives wanted to borrow it as they were walking distance to the ocean. BUT NOT A SINGLE PERSON OFFERED TO PAY ONE CENT TOWARDS THE UTILITIES THEY CONSUMED WHILE USING THE HOUSE.

I had a faux friend as you describe--always contacted me about sports teams, advice on cars, hvac, finances. Pics of an exciting vacation sorta bragging.

August 2021 I said wow haven't heard from you in ages, since we last talked my wife left me, took my son, and came back.

Do you think he asked oh what happened, how you doing, etc.?

I'm telling you those people who are around when you experience a life event, those are your friends.

 

[football]

I own a truck. Do you know how many “friends” and family think that means I’m a free volunteer delivery service? It’s ridiculous.

I helped an extended family member (multi millionaire business owner) move some furniture once. Took 4 hours of my time, 60 miles of travel, plus delivery up stairs using my labor and my furniture dolly and probably $15 worth of gas.

Dude offered a minimal thanks and couldnt even throw me $20 to help pay for gas. That was the last straw.

He has asked multiple times for help after that and I always say, “sorry, I’m busy.” He even asked to borrow my truck. “Sorry, it’s broke down.”

 

[Finklejag]

Two types of people in the world, givers and takers.

 

[SubieRubyRoo]

i have lots of friends and relatives call me to come help them fix something. be it car or home or something else. 90% of the time i end up doing it all myself. the old folks and others that clearly don't have the ability to help they get a pass.

But i have able body friends younger than me call me to "help" fix their stuff which ends up me fixing it. i am going to start making them put some skin in the game next time .

So what % of the help would you expect them to assist?

If you have to ask, it’s probably less help than is warranted on their part.

 

[SubieRubyRoo]

I own a truck. Do you know how many “friends” and family think that means I’m a free volunteer delivery service? It’s ridiculous.

I helped an extended family member (multi millionaire business owner) move some furniture once. Took 4 hours of my time, 60 miles of travel, plus delivery up stairs using my labor and my furniture dolly and probably $15 worth of gas.

Dude offered a minimal thanks and couldnt even throw me $20 to help pay for gas. That was the last straw.

He has asked multiple times for help after that and I always say, “sorry, I’m busy.” He even asked to borrow my truck. “Sorry, it’s broke down.”

Take your pick, whatever’s more your style: