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#4521680 - 09/20/17 09:25 PM People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying.
Kurtatron Offline


Registered: 04/06/10
Posts: 166
Loc: Detroit
Anyone else have this problem? Flaky friends. So summer is ending soon and I want to go enjoy the outdoors before it is cold for next 6 months. Last 2 weeks I have been trying to get some people together for camping, and really all I need is a single other person to go. But I can't even get that. Just a simple Friday and Saturday. This is what ANNOYS ME to no end. Excuses without any sort of proof afterwards. One says I have to fix my garage, replace rotten wood etc. because city has demanded I fix it by such and such date. But I know his history, he will just procrastinate, put off doing work until the last second. He could easily go camping, but you know what I hear? Excuses. It took him 3 months to change timing belt on his CRV, 2 months to change rotten power steering line, and other stuff. Oh, and I tried to get him to do stuff while he was fixing those cars, but he always used those car repairs as an excuse. Many weekends he never did any work. He is always making excuses when I want to do things with him, but he never seems to have anything going on when HE is the one planning the camping trip.

And then I have another friend, who tells me has to study for a final exam. He says he can't go camping because he has to study for a final, but you know what he has done for last several days? Watch me playing video games all the rest of the evening after work. I feel like telling him to go study, but I believe it won't change the excuse he is making. And then I got 2 other friends who are comfort addicts and don't want to do anything but play games all day every day, and don't want to camp in a tent because it is not comfortable.

I mean, I totally get that if you don't like camping in a tent, you don't like it. Fine. I do not ask my comfort addict friends to go camping. But some of my friends say they really like it, but NEVER seem to get around to doing it. My friend who is studying likes camping he says, but hasn't done it for like 8 years. Ugh! I just get tired of talk, but no walk. Another couple at my work always talk about wanting to go camping, but when we bring it up, they say, "It's too cold!" "That's too far away!" "That is too expensive!" "That has no shower!" Blah blah blah.

Rant over. My question is are most people like this? Do most people really just want to avoid any kind of commitment to doing something? I am I just out of luck? Or do I really need to change my expectations? I don't understand why people just like to sit around at home and do nothing. My friend who studied for a final literally just slept till like 3pm last saturday. It drives men nuts. Why can't I find anyone who likes to get out of the house? Is this rare? I could go camping alone, but it is a long drive!


Edited by Kurtatron (09/20/17 09:32 PM)

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#4521684 - 09/20/17 09:29 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
justintendo Offline


Registered: 03/04/17
Posts: 101
Loc: northwest pa
yes this is normal, and yes it is annoying. i think its just people in general. no one is ever up for doing anything.
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#4521685 - 09/20/17 09:32 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
JohnnyJohnson Offline


Registered: 10/22/09
Posts: 2734
Loc: Wet side WA
LOL go by yourself and find peace!
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#4521688 - 09/20/17 09:33 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
rooflessVW Online   content


Registered: 12/24/11
Posts: 4034
Loc: North Carolina
Eh, politeness is ruining our society.

If you had this conversation with your "friends" instead of us, there would likely be forward progress.

Likewise, if your friends would just say, "bro I don't want to go camping," you wouldn't be worried about their motivations.
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#4521690 - 09/20/17 09:35 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: JohnnyJohnson]
Kurtatron Offline


Registered: 04/06/10
Posts: 166
Loc: Detroit
I really think I should. Just to get away. I haven't even tried doing it alone yet. And then when my friends ask me if they want to go camping, I will say I already went, sorry. Remember when I invited you?

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#4521693 - 09/20/17 09:42 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
blupupher Offline


Registered: 08/27/04
Posts: 4420
Loc: Katy, Republic of Texas
Get new friends... while camping.
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#4521708 - 09/20/17 09:57 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
andrewp1998 Offline


Registered: 10/18/08
Posts: 853
Loc: MA USA
Yes, family and friends , its always about their schedule thats why I have just a few real close friends. They also dont seem to take no for an answer .

Camped with a buddy a few times and he was way to high maintenance, sleeps to late, forgets things and mainly just wants to sit around and drink , eat and talk to much , no cell phone charger , no sleeping bag, no foot print for his piece of [censored] tent.

No more!
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#4521713 - 09/20/17 09:59 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
andrewp1998 Offline


Registered: 10/18/08
Posts: 853
Loc: MA USA
Originally Posted By: Kurtatron
I really think I should. Just to get away. I haven't even tried doing it alone yet. And then when my friends ask me if they want to go camping, I will say I already went, sorry. Remember when I invited you?


I just went last 2 times alone, big group events seem better if organized by an official leader.
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#4521716 - 09/20/17 10:04 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
andrewp1998 Offline


Registered: 10/18/08
Posts: 853
Loc: MA USA
Try to join a group that does just that, a camping group. Then you will make friends who will go outside of the group.
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#4521718 - 09/20/17 10:07 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
Johnny2Bad Offline


Registered: 05/20/13
Posts: 1810
Loc: Saskatchewan, Canada
If you really want to to the outdoors thing, you have to find people like yourself who like to do it (and WILL do it). I love my buddies but my friends are not the right kind of people. You need to find other like-minded people, and in time THEY will become friends. It doesn't really work the other way around, unfortunately.

I have what amounts to two groups of close friends, and they don't mingle much. Some are buddies, some are people I met through the outdoors. They are not the same people. You should try to do the same. With you being in Detroit, I know there are Outdoors people in Michigan. Keep some photos (fish, scenery, whatever) on your phone and see who is most interested, for example. You might find people you know now only as acquaintances who would be interested.
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#4521740 - 09/20/17 10:34 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
PumpPusher Offline


Registered: 12/18/15
Posts: 148
Loc: Texas
I would guess most people are not very outdoorsy. To me, I see camping as alot of work. I don't think I would want to work all week and then go "work" more. If it's about hanging out, maybe do something they are interested in?

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#4521756 - 09/20/17 10:53 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
AlaskaMike Offline


Registered: 05/28/10
Posts: 271
Loc: Alaska
Don't get bent out of shape about it. For a lot of people their weekend is their downtime, and they may not be all that motivated to go out and do something, regardless of what it is. What PumpPusher says makes a lot of sense.

There may be other reasons you're not aware of that they don't want to go camping too, so don't assume it's some form of timid laziness on their part. They may just not want to share their reasons.


Edited by AlaskaMike (09/20/17 10:57 PM)

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#4521758 - 09/20/17 10:58 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
Rolla07 Offline


Registered: 11/05/11
Posts: 4734
Loc: MTL, CANADA
You need to find a date who likes to camp! Or join a group that does. If they dont wana go, find new friends who do and make them jealous.
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#4521774 - 09/20/17 11:30 PM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: Kurtatron]
beanoil Offline


Registered: 10/17/04
Posts: 2951
Loc: Midwest, Illinois
Go by yourself, problem solved.
Adopt a hound, walk said dog, watch ladies approach you, find a camping mate.
Really, you are in a target rich environment to find a camp mate at a campground.
Beer always tastes better in front of a campfire.
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#4521808 - 09/21/17 12:28 AM Re: People adverse to weekend plans. Annoying. [Re: beanoil]
Lolvoguy Offline


Registered: 02/06/14
Posts: 2328
Loc: Canada
Originally Posted By: beanoil
Go by yourself, problem solved.
Adopt a hound, walk said dog, watch ladies approach you, find a camping mate.
Really, you are in a target rich environment to find a camp mate at a campground.
Beer always tastes better in front of a campfire.


Exactly!

Your first problem is relying on others to make you happy.
As you get older you'll realize everyone eventually will disappoint you.
The sooner you can pick yourself up and start taking responsibility for your happiness, the sooner you'll start being happy.
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