Things you'll probably never hear a southerner say
1. "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex"
2. Duct tape won't fix that
3. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken's
4. We don't keep firearms in this house.
5. Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
6. You can't feed that to the dog.
7. I thought Graceland was tacky.
8. Kids sit down in the back of the pick-up when I go around a corner
9. Wrasslin's fake.
10. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
11. We're vegetarians.
12. Do you think my hair is too big?
13. I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
14. Honey, these bonsai trees need watering.
15. It's okay for women to sweat.
16. Give me just the small bag of pork rinds.
17. Deer heads detract from the decor.
18. Spitting is such a nasty habit.
19. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
20. Trim the fat off that steak.
21. Cappuccino tastes better than a Yahoo.
22. The tires on that truck are too big.
23. Let's not cook the vegtables in bacon fat today.
24. I've got it all on a floppy disk.
25. Only 5 sugars in my tea, thanks.
26. Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
27. My fiance, Debbie Bobbie Sue, is registered at Tiffany's.
28. The neighbors might think poorly of major appliances in the front yard
29. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
30. Checkmate.
31. She's too old to be wearing that bikini.
32. No really. It's the guns that kill people.
33. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
34. I don't have a favorite college team.
35. Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
36. I believe you cooked those green beans too long.
37. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Wanda.
38. Elvis who?
39. I'm not leavin' my trailer to go on the Jerry Springer Show.
40. I really like New Yorkers.
1. "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex"
2. Duct tape won't fix that
3. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken's
4. We don't keep firearms in this house.
5. Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
6. You can't feed that to the dog.
7. I thought Graceland was tacky.
8. Kids sit down in the back of the pick-up when I go around a corner
9. Wrasslin's fake.
10. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
11. We're vegetarians.
12. Do you think my hair is too big?
13. I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
14. Honey, these bonsai trees need watering.
15. It's okay for women to sweat.
16. Give me just the small bag of pork rinds.
17. Deer heads detract from the decor.
18. Spitting is such a nasty habit.
19. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
20. Trim the fat off that steak.
21. Cappuccino tastes better than a Yahoo.
22. The tires on that truck are too big.
23. Let's not cook the vegtables in bacon fat today.
24. I've got it all on a floppy disk.
25. Only 5 sugars in my tea, thanks.
26. Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
27. My fiance, Debbie Bobbie Sue, is registered at Tiffany's.
28. The neighbors might think poorly of major appliances in the front yard
29. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
30. Checkmate.
31. She's too old to be wearing that bikini.
32. No really. It's the guns that kill people.
33. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
34. I don't have a favorite college team.
35. Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
36. I believe you cooked those green beans too long.
37. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Wanda.
38. Elvis who?
39. I'm not leavin' my trailer to go on the Jerry Springer Show.
40. I really like New Yorkers.
