qwerty, wait until she gets in a fender bender first. She probably doesn't drive fast enough to do much damage to her car or anyone else's. But if she has memory problems, she'll forget the mistake she made unless you have the damaged car there to remind her. If you pull her license now, she'll think you're being an overbearing control freak.
When Is "Too Old" To Drive????
- Thread starter qwerty1234
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Merk, shes almost 90 years. At what point to you say enough? Shes on a variety of medication which includes pain meds. I hate to see her get pulled over. Do you think they would handcuff a 90 year old?
Hand cuff her for what; taking pain meds ? Everybody takes pain meds. The pharmaceutical companies aren't rich for nothing. You expect everybody with a drivers license to be in perfect health ? What if there was a law that said anybody with a body fat percentage over 10% couldn't drive ? You'd eliminate 90% of the drivers on the road overnight.
Originally Posted By: Ducked
EVERYBODY here does have dementia.
Only when they drive though. Cultural thing.
That's my whole point: there are no perfect drivers unless they run 5 miles a day; have a blood pressure of 120/60; a pulse rate of 40; and a body fat percentage of no more than 3 percent. They can't have elevated triglycerides either.
EVERYBODY here does have dementia.
Only when they drive though. Cultural thing.
That's my whole point: there are no perfect drivers unless they run 5 miles a day; have a blood pressure of 120/60; a pulse rate of 40; and a body fat percentage of no more than 3 percent. They can't have elevated triglycerides either.
Originally Posted By: crazyoildude
Here in NJ there is no test they can drive as long as they can.. They Vote so you know how that goes..
In Illinois after 80 they must take a DMV driving test every 2 years I think. Thats scary that folk in their 90's are driving around NJ.
Same goes for NY, IIRC a drivers license is good for 8 years here, and then all you have to do is pass an eye test and pay a fee. I like the idea Illinois tests people every 2 years at age 80, it might pay to test them annually. I have nothing against elderly people driving, as long as they're able to do it safely. The only way to know if they're doing it safely is to test them. Too bad it can't be done on a Federal level.
Here in NJ there is no test they can drive as long as they can.. They Vote so you know how that goes..
In Illinois after 80 they must take a DMV driving test every 2 years I think. Thats scary that folk in their 90's are driving around NJ.
Same goes for NY, IIRC a drivers license is good for 8 years here, and then all you have to do is pass an eye test and pay a fee. I like the idea Illinois tests people every 2 years at age 80, it might pay to test them annually. I have nothing against elderly people driving, as long as they're able to do it safely. The only way to know if they're doing it safely is to test them. Too bad it can't be done on a Federal level.
Someone with dementia has no business being on the road, no matter their age. There comes a time when an elderly person's driving privileged has to be removed; by your own account she can't pass a driving test so it's time. Waiting until she's harmed herself, or worse yet, someone else, is incredibly bad advice. Anyone with a lick of common sense could see that.
Originally Posted By: Merkava_4
qwerty, wait until she gets in a fender bender first.
And what happens if that "fender bender" is with kid on a bike?
Originally Posted By: Merkava_4
I consider myself an excellent driver, but I'd probably fail the test too...
I'm hopped up on all kinds of medications too...
Those two comments should be enough to you to disqualify you from driving.
Originally Posted By: Merkava_4
Everybody takes pain meds.
No, not everyone does. Neither my wife nor I take any pills of any sort.
Originally Posted By: Merkava_4
qwerty, wait until she gets in a fender bender first.
And what happens if that "fender bender" is with kid on a bike?
Originally Posted By: Merkava_4
I consider myself an excellent driver, but I'd probably fail the test too...
I'm hopped up on all kinds of medications too...
Those two comments should be enough to you to disqualify you from driving.
Originally Posted By: Merkava_4
Everybody takes pain meds.
No, not everyone does. Neither my wife nor I take any pills of any sort.
Say to her, Grandma, we want to see you make it to 100 and the only way we are gonna make tmagic year is if you stop driving.
Trade her for a 4 wheel electric scooter if it's just local she ll love it .make sure it has good battery since lead battery are a nono
But let her try her second try . She raised you so she must know a bit more then you give her credit for lol..from a truck driver point of view? Most elderly drive better. But I would like them to stay on the right of the road (north America)not because they drive bad. It because other do drive bad
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Person specific. My 91 year old neighbor who is female is very sharp and drives about in a pristine Golf R with manual transmission and also has a 1 series covertible as her summer ride.
Originally Posted By: Pop_Rivit
Those two comments should be enough to you to disqualify you from driving.
That's why I'm so careful while I'm driving; I don't want to lose my license and then have to take the test.
The last time I took a driver's test, I was 17 years old and driving my Grandpa's '67 Pontiac Bonneville.
Those two comments should be enough to you to disqualify you from driving.
That's why I'm so careful while I'm driving; I don't want to lose my license and then have to take the test.
The last time I took a driver's test, I was 17 years old and driving my Grandpa's '67 Pontiac Bonneville.
I went through this with my grandmother since she also had dementia. As you said it does not get better with dementia... only worse and worse up to an eventual death. By the responses from some, it's clear they never witnessed someone with this disease. In your state you at least have the driving tests for the elderly, so if she fails another one that might just do it for you. I had to make the decision and pull hers when I felt it was right. Sure you will be getting lots of backlash from them, but it's only thinking about their safety and the safety of others who are around when she is driving. Basically I spent 7 years taking care of her until it finally did her in at 92, but it was worth it to me. I know one old man now (he's 92) and he is a rarity because he refuses to drive anymore. He says he doesn't feel he is a safe driver. It would be great if everyone thought that way! haha In my area there is always some story of an old person with dementia driving into a house, or driving for miles on the wrong side of the highway. When they hit a building you get the response "I thought I was pushing the brake pedal". That's not exactly somebody I want on the road! Good luck though... I don't envy being in your position.
I have said for years: Mandatory yearly eyesight and cognitive tests. Perhaps every 2 years, a mandatory road test. If you're OK and pass at 90, great. Fail at 70? Sorry.
Originally Posted By: cptbarkey
My dad is 84 and we say he is pretty much done when he drives off at 2am for a 10am appointment. That was not a fun day.
Yeah everyone saying they want people on the road with dementia don't know anyone that actually has a bad case.. Things like this really do happen. They will start off somewhere and forget where they are going and not know how to get back home. Dementia doesn't equal forgetful...
My dad is 84 and we say he is pretty much done when he drives off at 2am for a 10am appointment. That was not a fun day.
Yeah everyone saying they want people on the road with dementia don't know anyone that actually has a bad case.. Things like this really do happen. They will start off somewhere and forget where they are going and not know how to get back home. Dementia doesn't equal forgetful...
Too old to drive is when your reaction time, awareness and judgement have gone away. I saw this in my father when he turned 83.
And it's no bargain convincing a loved one that it's time to hang up the car keys.
And it's no bargain convincing a loved one that it's time to hang up the car keys.
Originally Posted By: Chris Meutsch
I have said for years: Mandatory yearly eyesight and cognitive tests. Perhaps every 2 years, a mandatory road test. If you're OK and pass at 90, great. Fail at 70? Sorry.
Unaffordable.. you have to test/retest everyone the same 22 y.o. or 82 y.o. Where have you been?
I have said for years: Mandatory yearly eyesight and cognitive tests. Perhaps every 2 years, a mandatory road test. If you're OK and pass at 90, great. Fail at 70? Sorry.
Unaffordable.. you have to test/retest everyone the same 22 y.o. or 82 y.o. Where have you been?
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Originally Posted By: qwerty1234
In Illinois after 80 they must take a DMV driving test every 2 years I think. Thats scary that folk in their 90's are driving around NJ.
It's 75 in NH for the elderly driving exams when renewing licenses. My Dad hated having to take that test. The guy from the DMV was kind of a tool I guess and was very demeaning to the elderly people. He made my Dad very nervous as well. My Dad always passed but he would be all upset and sputtering about the DMV guy who went with him every time on the way home.
Age really doesn't matter. There are people who are old and driving that are better at it then a lot of young people. I know people who still drove into their 90's who were perfectly fine. I have known others who shouldn't have been driving at 30 as well. I actually like the driving test requirement for elderly people. Let's the unsafe be weeded out yet allows those still able to do so. Very fair system.
Anyway, back to your original question...
From all of your posts about her dementia, med's, close calls, etc... it sounds to me like it is past time for her to lose her license. The loss of one's license is a big deal and it is a shame when it happens( for age or medical reasons )but you have to worry about what they might do. If the risk was just to themselves then that would be different. Unfortunately, they are a danger to everyone else on the road with them so you have to act for the good of all.
In an ideal scenario she would realize she shouldn't drive anymore and voluntarily stop completely like my Dad did when he was in his mid 80's. Just got the point he didn't feel his reflexes and reaction times were good enough anymore even though he could still pass the DMV driving test. It made him awful nervous driving in his later years and he stopped driving at night years before he stopped driving completely. I had been driving him for a few years anyway( had him keep his license and drive now and then just in case of an emergency or something happened to me )though so it was easier for him to let go at the end.
It is definitely a hard thing for people who age to give up the freedom of driving but when they become a danger to others on the road it is time. Sounds to me like your Grandmother is at the point she needs to stop driving; voluntarily or not.
In Illinois after 80 they must take a DMV driving test every 2 years I think. Thats scary that folk in their 90's are driving around NJ.
It's 75 in NH for the elderly driving exams when renewing licenses. My Dad hated having to take that test. The guy from the DMV was kind of a tool I guess and was very demeaning to the elderly people. He made my Dad very nervous as well. My Dad always passed but he would be all upset and sputtering about the DMV guy who went with him every time on the way home.
Age really doesn't matter. There are people who are old and driving that are better at it then a lot of young people. I know people who still drove into their 90's who were perfectly fine. I have known others who shouldn't have been driving at 30 as well. I actually like the driving test requirement for elderly people. Let's the unsafe be weeded out yet allows those still able to do so. Very fair system.
Anyway, back to your original question...
From all of your posts about her dementia, med's, close calls, etc... it sounds to me like it is past time for her to lose her license. The loss of one's license is a big deal and it is a shame when it happens( for age or medical reasons )but you have to worry about what they might do. If the risk was just to themselves then that would be different. Unfortunately, they are a danger to everyone else on the road with them so you have to act for the good of all.
In an ideal scenario she would realize she shouldn't drive anymore and voluntarily stop completely like my Dad did when he was in his mid 80's. Just got the point he didn't feel his reflexes and reaction times were good enough anymore even though he could still pass the DMV driving test. It made him awful nervous driving in his later years and he stopped driving at night years before he stopped driving completely. I had been driving him for a few years anyway( had him keep his license and drive now and then just in case of an emergency or something happened to me )though so it was easier for him to let go at the end.
It is definitely a hard thing for people who age to give up the freedom of driving but when they become a danger to others on the road it is time. Sounds to me like your Grandmother is at the point she needs to stop driving; voluntarily or not.
It is more person specific than age. My Grandma was still a good, safe driver until she passed in her early 80's. My Great Uncle abruptly gave it up himself in his early 70's. My Mother in Law has never driven (thank God), she doesn't make good, timely decisions. I think there are some other factors that should be looked at more closely than just age. Things like; heart health, mental health, vision, and general driving ability.
I don't know that I could give up driving easily if I get to that point. I think the biggest piece of understanding when to stop driving is to see clearly the responsibility you have to other road users, your passengers and yourself.
Sometimes doing the right thing isn't easy.
I don't know that I could give up driving easily if I get to that point. I think the biggest piece of understanding when to stop driving is to see clearly the responsibility you have to other road users, your passengers and yourself.
Sometimes doing the right thing isn't easy.
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