Ordering Pizza in 2020

Joined
Sep 26, 2007
Messages
250
Location
Bowling Green, OH
CALLER: Is this Gordon's Pizza?

GOOGLE: No sir, it's Google Pizza.

CALLER: I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.

GOOGLE: No sir, Google bought Gordon's Pizza last month.

CALLER: OK. I would like to order a pizza.

GOOGLE: Do you want your usual, sir?

CALLER: My usual? You know me?

GOOGLE: According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.

CALLER: OK! That's what I want ...

GOOGLE: May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?

CALLER: What? I detest vegetable!

GOOGLE: Your cholesterol is not good, sir.

CALLER: How the [censored] do you know!

GOOGLE: Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.

CALLER: Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol.

GOOGLE: Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you purchased only a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once, at Drug RX Network, 4 months ago.

CALLER: I bought more from another drugstore.

GOOGLE: That doesn't show on your credit card statement.

CALLER: I paid in cash.

GOOGLE: But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.

CALLER: I have other sources of cash.

GOOGLE: That doesn't show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law.

CALLER: WHAT THE HECK!

GOOGLE: I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you.

CALLER: Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others. I'm going to an island without internet, cable TV, where there is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.

GOOGLE: I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago...
 
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lol.gif
A little too close to reality though...
 
The Liberati's black helicopters will be flying over your house tonight.
 
Originally Posted by walterjay
Actually, not too far from the truth.

What is a joke today, is reality tomorrow.
 
Originally Posted by walterjay
Actually, not too far from the truth.


Yes they have more information than you ever intended them to have in fact I wouldn't be surprised if they had your DNA.
 
I recently watched an episode of "The X-Files" where the computers and electronic machines turned on Mulder and Scully because they didn't leave a tip at a restaurant that was fully automated. It was hilarious and truthful at the same time.
 
In the past one of the big things limiting spying on people has been the high number of man hours involved. As computers become more and more powerful in the future the number of man hours required can and most probably will be reduced making it easier and cheaper to spy on people.
 
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