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Missing Wife #5396428 04/07/20 12:53 PM
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 4,855
0
02SE Offline OP
OP Offline
0
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 4,855
Borrowed from another website...



Husband:
My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home

Officer:
Age?

Husband:
I'm not sure. Somewhere between 50 and 60. We don't do birthdays.


Officer:
Height

Husband:
I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

OFFICER :
Weight?

Husband:
Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.

OFFICER :
Colour of eyes?

Husband:
Sort of brown I think Never really noticed.


OFFICER:
Colour of hair?

Husband:
Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.

OFFICER:
What was she wearing?

Husband:
Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.

OFFICER:
What kind of car did she go in?

Husband:
She went in my truck.

OFFICER:
What kind of truck was it?

Husband:
A 2017, manufactured September 16th, pearl white Ram Limited 4X4 .with 6.4l Hemi V8 engine ordered with the Ram Box bar and fridge option, led lighting, back up and front camera, Moose hide leather heated and cooled seats, climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, Weather Tech floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch, sunroof, DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio, Cobra 75 WX ST 40-channel CB radio, six cup holders, 3 USB ports, and 4 power outlets. I added special alloy wheels and off-road Toyo tires. It has custom retracting running boards and under-glow wheel well lighting. At this point the husband started choking up.

OFFICER:
Take it easy sir, We'll find your truck.

Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396430 04/07/20 12:56 PM
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 10,371
B
bullwinkle Offline
Offline
B
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 10,371
LOL
Fortunately my wife won’t drive my truck!


06 Ram 3500 CTD 4X4(FG Venturi), 89 F-450 7.3, 98 XJ 4.0(XG8A), 05 xB(XG3600), 18 Transit 3.7 (MC), 03 Merc Grand Marquis 4.6 2V(XG2), 11 Express 3500 6.0 (Fram PH10060 for now)
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396461 04/07/20 01:46 PM
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 774
J
Jimkobb Offline
Offline
J
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 774
good one LOL


green_bay_packers_logo_small[1]
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396470 04/07/20 01:50 PM
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 12,295
wemay Online Happy
Online Happy
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 12,295
LOL


2019 Volkswagen Passat Wolfsburg TSI: EDGE 0W-20, PL21478 o.filter
2013 Hyundai Santa Fe Sport 2.0T: RGT 5W-30, OE o.filter
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396476 04/07/20 01:54 PM
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 7,473
D
doitmyself Offline
Offline
D
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 7,473
LOL Excellent. Reminds me of the oft' told joke ad: Farmer looking for a wife with tractor. If interested, please send picture of the tractor.

Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396478 04/07/20 01:58 PM
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 4,662
G
Gebo Offline
Offline
G
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 4,662
Awesome ! Thanks for the laugh.


'98 LEX LS400 310K
'02 4Runner 250K
'05 Lex LS430 90K
'07 Lex GX470 75K

Shell Gas and Truck 5w-30
Amsoil OE 10w-30
Toyota ATF's and Coolant
Amsoil Gear Oil and Grease
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396519 04/07/20 02:40 PM
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 9,687
C
Cujet Offline
Offline
C
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 9,687
Hahahahahaha, love it.


People who count on their fingers should maintain a discreet silence.
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396633 04/07/20 04:45 PM
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 725
L
littleant Offline
Offline
L
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 725
Now this is funny. Thanks


I can't prevent getting old but I REFUSE to grow up.
2010 Mountaineer 4.0
2002 Jeep Wrangler TJ 4.0
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396647 04/07/20 05:09 PM
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,072
J
John_K Offline
Offline
J
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 3,072
And if the husband was missing it would be the exact opposite. Wife would describe his clothing in detail then say "well it's a truck. You know, with a bed. Chrysler might make it. Or Buick. Not sure." getdown


2009 Mercury Grand Marquis, 8 cyl auto, 98xxx miles, PU/Fram Ultra
2005 Hyundai Sonata, 4 cyl auto, 101xxx miles, Maxlife/OEM Filter
Current oil stash: 446 qts.


Re: Missing Wife [Re: bullwinkle] #5396692 04/07/20 06:04 PM
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 14,021
M
Miller88 Offline
Offline
M
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 14,021
Originally Posted by bullwinkle
LOL
Fortunately my wife won’t drive my truck!


All of my road going vehicles are a manual, so same thing here!

I offered up the Cherokee last summer when the Leaseon was rearended. Well, it doesn't have AC, doesn't like to go above 50, doesn't have any steering, no carpet so it gets 900 degrees inside. it was not taken.


18 Forester 2.5I 6M
00 Jeep XJ
01 F-350 4x4 5M
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5396824 04/07/20 08:37 PM
Joined: Feb 2019
Posts: 1,346
P10crew Offline
Offline
Joined: Feb 2019
Posts: 1,346
👍

Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5397517 04/08/20 03:56 PM
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 774
J
Jimkobb Offline
Offline
J
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 774
"Missing Wife"
Aim a little higher. LOL


green_bay_packers_logo_small[1]
Re: Missing Wife [Re: 02SE] #5412270 04/24/20 07:53 PM
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 3,220
B
Brybo86 Offline
Offline
B
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 3,220
Hahahhahah


12 Honda Odyssey 112k
09 Kymco Super8
08 Honda Accord 2.4L 164k
01 Kymco People 50
95 Yamaha Jog
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