Buying crappy cars is one of the brightest elements of my life. I actually have the itch right now, but Craigslist is failing to provide me with something crappy enough.
I once bought a 1991 Mercedes 300E for $300. Parked in a field with the windows down, full of rainwater. There was some sort of plant or fungi growth in the back seat, but the tires still held air. I headed out there with a friend and a truck full of tools, and we worked on it for 8 hours to get it running so I could drive it home (about 15 miles). I had to keep the pedal on the floor the whole way to keep it from dying, and since the wiring was wet, the alarm was going off the entire way; flashing lights, horn, all that. I passed a cop on the way, but my friend was following me in my truck and he slowed down to let me get away. We also had to overfill the transmission (which, in other news, sometimes wouldn't go into reverse) because it leaked like a sieve and would have all drained out before I made it five miles. That was a fun car. I still get sad when I see pictures of it. But according to my precise records, I made $124 when I sold it. What a deal!
The 2008 Dodge Charger police car I have now I paid $900 for, with a fried ECU, messed up wiring, and skipped timing. I still have no idea how all those things were wrong at the same time, but I'm 95% sure the timing skipped because someone was doing neutral drops. Also the brake booster lines and egr lines were all messed up, but I think that was due to someone trying to fix it. I actually had to tow it home (with a trailer, not a ratchet strap). Now it runs fine of course, with a new timing belt, all new fluids, new tires, etc. It's been a nice car, great for taking on trips and getting pulled over in, but I think I'll sell it soon. The only vehicle I keep is my S10, which is manual.
One of the best times I ever had driving a used car home though wasn't even one of my cars. My friend brought me along to look at it and test drive it for him because he couldn't drive manual at the time (same friend who helped work on the Benz). It was a MK2 Jetta diesel, with an ailing turbo and some sort of brake issue. I say "some sort" because I don't know what exactly was wrong, but there were practically no brakes. On the test drive I almost had a heart attack when I hit the brakes approaching a stop sign, nothing happened (if I dug in with both feet and held the wheel with both hands, it would start to slow down). The man selling the car thought it was fine, and brilliant friend bought it anyway (it sounded like a tractor). I then drove it 50 miles home, leaving plenty of space between my bumper and his Avalon so I wouldn't hit him. I loved that car so much (I still have pictures of it on my phone). It became a major part of our lives for many months, and thank goodness I wasn't the one paying for parts. It was horrendous to work on, the brakes never did work right, the turbo was definitely messed up somehow, and it was so slow that my S10 could have beat it to while towing 5000lbs and with flat tires. But once it was driving it handled like it was on rails, and it just had so much character. And since he was tired of paying for parts my friend sold it and now drives a Chevy C/K which just isn't the same to me. The tragedies of life.
Sorry for the long stories, but this forum seems like the kind of place where y'all might enjoy it. Am I the only one who enjoys tinkering with junk?