Originally Posted by doitmyself
Originally Posted by IronMaidenRules
Originally Posted by spasm3
Its unfortunate, but they are toxic to relationships and even though its not their fault, there is no real treatment or therapy. They just don't have empathy. Its worse when they are a parent. The children suffer.
Their behavior is absolutely their fault. They choose how they treat people. My ex wife is a narcissist and was constantly emotionally abusive and often physically abusive with me. She had many, many opportunities to choose the right path and she always chose not to. You can't choose the faults you're both with, but you can choose how you treat people. Narcissists are a cancer and unfortunately they seem to never choose to be miserable by themselves.
I disagree. Many serious personality disorders are the result of a physically malfunctioning brain. Think of it like an electrical circuit board with defective parts that don't allow the electrical paths to be completed. Sometimes medications can aid to allow the circuits to operate better. Sometimes therapy can allow the person to circumvent the faulty circuits and manage the process better.
Saying that people can choose to not be like this is no different than saying that a person can choose to not have genetically disposed heart disease, diabetes, etc.. Some people can lessen their risks with lifestyle changes, but many cannot avoid it no matter their diet and lifestyle.
You just agreed with me, though. As I said, we can't help what physical or mental flaws we're born with, but we can make the choices to lessen their impact. When narcissists choose deliberately to ignore the hurt they're inflicting on others and continue to do so, that makes them bad people. You can disagree if you'd like, but that's fact.