Living with a freeloader

Status
Not open for further replies.
Originally Posted by avacado11
Originally Posted by Nick1994
You've got a new Subaru, a Lexus, BMW, and a Maserati?

Move out and live on your own.


It's a long story lol. I have a house half way across the country. I work here temporally and don't really need a full blown house to myself. House sharing works out great if all parties are respectable.


So get an AirBNB as a long term rental and avoid these headaches.
 
As I understand it, with you not on the lease, you pay your portion of the rent back to the two individuals who are on the lease. This would simplify things. Keep track of the cost of items that he uses of yours and sit him down and explain that if he continues to use your stuff, you will deduct the value of those items from the amount of rent you owe him. It's still an inconvenience, but at least you get to recoup some of your money. Just wait until you get married. It gets worse.
 
Originally Posted by avacado11
I'm sure some of you have ran into trouble with housemates. How did you deal with it?

I'd lay down the law with regard to personal property. Also, I'd label all my belongings immediately (I still do that) . But experience tells me that you will not get a good result.

You are in a great position to fix things though, by moving out. You have reason enough.
 
Originally Posted by avacado11
Originally Posted by Nick1994
You've got a new Subaru, a Lexus, BMW, and a Maserati?

Move out and live on your own.


It's a long story lol. I have a house half way across the country. I work here temporally and don't really need a full blown house to myself. House sharing works out great if all parties are respectable.


Unless you're in your 20's why would you have roommates if you own a stash like that? You can obviously afford to rent an apartment by yourself, if you don't need a full blown house.
 
Originally Posted by atikovi
Originally Posted by avacado11
Originally Posted by Nick1994
You've got a new Subaru, a Lexus, BMW, and a Maserati?

Move out and live on your own.


It's a long story lol. I have a house half way across the country. I work here temporally and don't really need a full blown house to myself. House sharing works out great if all parties are respectable.


Unless you're in your 20's why would you have roommates if you own a stash like that? You can obviously afford to rent an apartment by yourself, if you don't need a full blown house.

Exactly.
 
Originally Posted by Trav
Launch the freeloader like a rocket.



Bingo, coworker or not. It doesn't matter. He's not going to improve, and you're only going to get more frustrated.
 
Seems like it would be hard for the OP (not on the lease) to kick out someone who IS on the lease.

Being assertive effectively takes skills that you aren't going to learn reading a few postings here. If you don't want confrontation, buy a $69 dollar mini fridge for your room and move the TV into your room.


On the passive aggressive side, my FIL always told us how they cured a refrigerator robber at work. They laced brownies, etc. with Ex lax laxative.
 
If you think that's bad, try living with a woman!
lol.gif
(Just kidding).
 
The two years I had my own one-bedroom apartment before I got involved with my now-wife were the greatest two years of my life. My own little piece of the world that no one could enter. It was awesome.

I don't know how anyone deals with some of the stuff I've read about having roommates. I would be in jail.
 
Do you seriously not know what to do? You are obviously an adult so I am going to just make the assumption that your parents still don't run your life. That's why it's puzzling you would throw this question out to us.

The answer is clear: Have a house meeting and call him out. Lay the ground rules for going forward. If he can't abide by it, find a month to month place to rent because it will only get worse. No reason to live like that as an adult with real money. Try to keep it as cordial as possible since you work with him. The reality is that since you are not on the lease, you can leave the problem.
 
You and #1 need to get together and discuss how to handle #2 the freeloader. If he cannot pull his own weight then you have a decision to make.

If you have the means, find your own place.
 
Just be simple and direct.

Ask him: Do you have my extension cord? I need it for my shop vac.

Ask him: Can you do some grocery shopping? We need milk, trash bags, paper towels, and toilet paper, etc.

Ask him: When are you going to pay me back the $25? Or just take it out of your share of the rent.

Maybe he's a follower-type, and is waiting to be asked these kinds of things.

Does he have a substance abuse problem? Is he a jerk? Then just move out. If you're not on the lease, you don't have much say in the apartment.
 
Last edited:
I had a roomate that would be frying up chicken late at night and all the fumes would wake me up. Tv would be blaring. Just kind of lived with it.

Then the next roomate would get up super early and run the blender for a few minutes. Whew!
 
Originally Posted by d00df00d

Start by pointing out facts, not by expressing value judgments. E.g., do not call him a freeloader to his face or tell him he's being a bad person or anything like that. At all. Seriously, you have to be super disciplined about that or it could make things a lot more difficult. Instead, tell him straight-up all the things that have happened that you don't like.
Then tell him you don't feel it's fair and can't allow it to continue.
Then invite him to have a real conversation about solutions. The solutions should be super concrete --
Then write everything down, with him present, and make at least a copy available to him. Seriously.
Again, keep it simple: facts, impacts, solutions, consequences. No value judgments, no punishments, no passing the buck.


BRAVO!

You have obviously have had some "high-end" marital counseling, or you are involved in the counseling field;
as I recognize these concepts
 
Originally Posted by simple_gifts
Two pages of responses and the standard BITOG coping method has not been mentioned?

Pee in his cowl.


Well the standard finance types of advice would be to tell him to "Pay your bills, deadbeat". And to also tell him to save money by driving a crown vic.
 
If you and your #1 agree, I'd have a face to face on what each of you should be responsible for. You need an INTERVENTION and have some ideas ready to submit. IF no agreement is made or if an agreement is made but, not followed through then, #1 Set a short date for the free loader to leave or #2 leave yourself because it appears to be messing with your JOY OF LIVING. Ed
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

F
Guy living in his car
8 9 10
Replies
182
Views
5K
gfh77665
shortyb
Guess its my turn, lost a dog buddy
2
Replies
26
Views
512
alarmguy
P
Weird Real Estate Situation with Buyers Cash- Ideas?
2 3
Replies
43
Views
821
CarLuver
Jdeere562
Sweet Revenge
2 3
Replies
42
Views
1K
JimPghPA
M
Morals and working with the public
2 3 4
Replies
63
Views
2K
John105
Back
Top