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Stupidest jokes - Please contribute #5129619
06/09/19 07:16 PM
06/09/19 07:16 PM
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 565
California
vavavroom Offline OP
vavavroom  Offline OP

Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 565
California
I'll start with a terribly bad joke, if you even can call it that. It amused my back-then 5-year old endlessly.


What did the Indian say when his dog fell off the bluff?

"Doggone!"

Last edited by vavavroom; 06/09/19 07:42 PM.
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129643
06/09/19 07:41 PM
06/09/19 07:41 PM
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 10,264
out there
spasm3 Offline
spasm3  Offline

Joined: May 2010
Posts: 10,264
out there
For the healthcare workers;

What do you call the drink make with lidocaine and vodka?

A numbskull.


13 elantra 78k 5w30 synpwr
03 chevy avalanche 83k synpwr 5w30
17 mazda cx-5 12300 miles m1 0w30
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129697
06/09/19 08:38 PM
06/09/19 08:38 PM
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,921
Virginia
mattwithcats Offline
mattwithcats  Offline

Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,921
Virginia
What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?

The taste...


2009 Smart Pure
Pennzoil Platinum Euro 0W-40, Wix XP 51356 filter, 45 mpg...
185/55R15 General HP tires, "H" speed rated, 44 psi (300 kpa)
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129699
06/09/19 08:38 PM
06/09/19 08:38 PM
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 238
Kevil,Ky
vwmaniaman Offline
vwmaniaman  Offline

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 238
Kevil,Ky
What do you call a muddy chicken that crossed the road twice????

A dirty double crosser!!!!


Don't waste your time on a slipshod repair.
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129710
06/09/19 08:44 PM
06/09/19 08:44 PM
Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 34
AR
Jethro_Bob Offline
Jethro_Bob  Offline

Joined: Jun 2018
Posts: 34
AR
A man walks into a bar, "ouch".

Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129712
06/09/19 08:46 PM
06/09/19 08:46 PM
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 13,142
The Motor City
Kestas Offline
Global Moderator
Kestas  Offline
Global Moderator

Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 13,142
The Motor City
Why can you never go hungry at the beach?

Because of all the sand which is (sandwiches) there.

Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129754
06/09/19 09:32 PM
06/09/19 09:32 PM
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 4,258
Lima, Ohio, USA
earlyre Offline
earlyre  Offline

Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 4,258
Lima, Ohio, USA
Where is Engagement, Ohio?



Halfway Between Dayton, and Marion.





and b/c I have the sort of mind that HAD to see what really was half way between Dayton and Marion.......Mechanicsburg...


Mine:
13 Ford C-MAX hybrid: MC 5w20, & FL910s (in theory)
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129776
06/09/19 09:51 PM
06/09/19 09:51 PM
Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 2,221
Western S.C.
CR94 Offline
CR94  Offline

Joined: Mar 2016
Posts: 2,221
Western S.C.
Here's a real oldie. Along with a lot of other classic folklore, my father learned it from his grandfather, who remembered the Civil War.

What's the shortest poem?

FLEAS
Adam
had 'em.

Last edited by CR94; 06/09/19 09:52 PM.

2011 Toyota Prius now at 101K
1981 Mazda GLC (323) retired at 606K
1972 Subaru DL retired at 190K
1954 Chevrolet retired at 121K
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129858
06/10/19 12:37 AM
06/10/19 12:37 AM
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 3,212
Yellowbrick Rd(KS)SemiRetired
Marco620 Offline
Marco620  Offline

Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 3,212
Yellowbrick Rd(KS)SemiRetired
What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you?

Nacho Cheese


15' Civic 1.8 i-vtec 254,000 mi Redline 5/0w20, BP transmax cvt fluid & Archoil9100
Tornado Chaser Extraordinar!
Son of a Navy Corpsman. Support vets!


Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129871
06/10/19 01:25 AM
06/10/19 01:25 AM
Joined: Dec 2017
Posts: 2,349
CO
JLTD Offline
JLTD  Offline

Joined: Dec 2017
Posts: 2,349
CO
What's a pirate's favorite letter? Ahrrrrrr. (R)

.
.
.
Wrong! It is the C.


I use the overseas manual to choose my oil viscosity.

Using AMSOIL

Hers: 2008 Jeep Liberty 149k, SS5w30/Amsoil

His: 2015 4Runner 55k, SS 5w20/Amsoil

Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129890
06/10/19 03:53 AM
06/10/19 03:53 AM
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,921
Virginia
mattwithcats Offline
mattwithcats  Offline

Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,921
Virginia
Here about the new addition to the Periodic Table?

It’s “Ah”,

the element of surprise....


2009 Smart Pure
Pennzoil Platinum Euro 0W-40, Wix XP 51356 filter, 45 mpg...
185/55R15 General HP tires, "H" speed rated, 44 psi (300 kpa)
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129894
06/10/19 04:01 AM
06/10/19 04:01 AM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 455
Kuala Lumpur ,Malaysia
alcyon Offline
alcyon  Offline

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 455
Kuala Lumpur ,Malaysia
Which country has the highest amount of germs ?
Germany !


Kyosho Optima Mid SWB, LWB and Lazer ZX
1991 Proton Saga 1.3S SOLD
1989 Toyota Soarer GT Twin Turbo L
1985 Kuwahara Survivor
1992 Robinson Pro
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129910
06/10/19 04:53 AM
06/10/19 04:53 AM
Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 455
Kuala Lumpur ,Malaysia
alcyon Offline
alcyon  Offline

Joined: Dec 2013
Posts: 455
Kuala Lumpur ,Malaysia
Where is the best place to park your camel ?


Why Camelot of course.


Kyosho Optima Mid SWB, LWB and Lazer ZX
1991 Proton Saga 1.3S SOLD
1989 Toyota Soarer GT Twin Turbo L
1985 Kuwahara Survivor
1992 Robinson Pro
Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129918
06/10/19 05:13 AM
06/10/19 05:13 AM
Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 5,702
The Midwest
skyactiv Offline
skyactiv  Offline

Joined: Mar 2013
Posts: 5,702
The Midwest
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese.



But it's only mild.


Wife: 15' Audi A4 quattro 6 speed manual
Me: 13' VW GTI 3 door 6 speed manual

Re: Stupidest jokes - Please contribute [Re: vavavroom] #5129977
06/10/19 07:31 AM
06/10/19 07:31 AM
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 539
One Step Beyond
MasterSolenoid Offline
MasterSolenoid  Offline

Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 539
One Step Beyond
While growing up, we were so poor,

One day I saw my Mother kicking a tin-can down the street.
I said, "Mom, what are you doing" ?
She said, "were moving".

Another time I saw my Mother walking down the street wearing only one shoe.
I said, "Mom, you lost a shoe".
She said, "No, I found a shoe".

Last edited by MasterSolenoid; 06/10/19 07:35 AM.

2002 Ford Ranger
2 Wheel Drive
3.0 Liter Engine
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Four basic premises of writing:
Clarity, Brevity, Simplicity, and Humanity.
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