So my wife believes in what she calls the "ask 10 grandmothers" to get a consensus of what people feel is right. So here is our background and question.
We watch our grandchild practically around the clock. The granddaughters mother is one who makes a lot of bad decisions in her life and has ended up living with us over the last 2 years on and off a total of just over 6 months. She became pregnant by my youngest son and then they broke up. The last time she moved in with us over some emergency move out she had to make we told her she was going to have to pay rent and pony up on childcare. She originally agreed to the terms but never seems to have money to pay. She does work full time with overtime hours and gets $2200.00 or better a month. We asked $400 rent for a room and $400 for day care. She works the third shift so the granddaughter is with us overnight. We get up in the morning and bathe and feed and take care of her during the day while mom sleeps. Mom is not really attached to the child emotionally but does not wish to give her up for adoption due to her own abandonment issues with her mom.
So we had a sit down with her and said we have helped and allowed her to live with us three separate times over the last two years and we have received no compensation for the hours needed to care for the child or to feed and clothe her and her daughter. Also we never asked her for rent on the room. She does not cook and refuses to learn how. Her response was that her therapist says grandparents should not charge for day care of grandchildren. I would agree with that if we were just watching her a few days a week during the afternoon or such but where we are doing the around the clock care and providing a roof over the mothers head and feeding both of them and I feel asking for financial help is not out of line.
My wife and I both are on SSI and I have a small retirement from past jobs. Between the two I have an income of $2000.00 a month. I also have a side part time job that can bring in $300 to $400 extra a month. My wife has a disability check for $900.00 My income pays household expenses and my wife pays for her personal medical needs with her check. Won't go into it here but the income is not available to household expenses. So I carry the load in that regard. My son as of yet has not manned up for his court appointed child care payments. He and I are in disagreement with his attitude about this.
So the question is are we out of line asking the mother of our grandaughter to be paying us for room and board and childcare expenses? What say you? Thanks for your responses.
We watch our grandchild practically around the clock. The granddaughters mother is one who makes a lot of bad decisions in her life and has ended up living with us over the last 2 years on and off a total of just over 6 months. She became pregnant by my youngest son and then they broke up. The last time she moved in with us over some emergency move out she had to make we told her she was going to have to pay rent and pony up on childcare. She originally agreed to the terms but never seems to have money to pay. She does work full time with overtime hours and gets $2200.00 or better a month. We asked $400 rent for a room and $400 for day care. She works the third shift so the granddaughter is with us overnight. We get up in the morning and bathe and feed and take care of her during the day while mom sleeps. Mom is not really attached to the child emotionally but does not wish to give her up for adoption due to her own abandonment issues with her mom.
So we had a sit down with her and said we have helped and allowed her to live with us three separate times over the last two years and we have received no compensation for the hours needed to care for the child or to feed and clothe her and her daughter. Also we never asked her for rent on the room. She does not cook and refuses to learn how. Her response was that her therapist says grandparents should not charge for day care of grandchildren. I would agree with that if we were just watching her a few days a week during the afternoon or such but where we are doing the around the clock care and providing a roof over the mothers head and feeding both of them and I feel asking for financial help is not out of line.
My wife and I both are on SSI and I have a small retirement from past jobs. Between the two I have an income of $2000.00 a month. I also have a side part time job that can bring in $300 to $400 extra a month. My wife has a disability check for $900.00 My income pays household expenses and my wife pays for her personal medical needs with her check. Won't go into it here but the income is not available to household expenses. So I carry the load in that regard. My son as of yet has not manned up for his court appointed child care payments. He and I are in disagreement with his attitude about this.
So the question is are we out of line asking the mother of our grandaughter to be paying us for room and board and childcare expenses? What say you? Thanks for your responses.
