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#4660699 - 02/09/18 08:52 AM English language
BalticBob Offline


Registered: 11/27/16
Posts: 395
Loc: Texas
1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

4. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

5. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

6. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

7. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

8. A thief fell into wet concrete. He became a hardened criminal.

9. Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.

10. We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

11. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.

12. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

13. The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

14. If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

15. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

16. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.)

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#4660729 - 02/09/18 09:19 AM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
Kruse Offline


Registered: 10/05/05
Posts: 4294
Loc: Kansas
Originally Posted By: BalticBob

11. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.


I remember my grade school teacher saying this...back in the early 70s.

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#4660882 - 02/09/18 11:22 AM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
MolaKule Offline


Registered: 06/05/02
Posts: 19042
Loc: Iowegia - USA
Good Stuff. crackmeup thumbsup

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#4660991 - 02/09/18 01:14 PM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
Kamele0N Offline


Registered: 02/09/15
Posts: 2037
Loc: Slovenia
6th....? shrug
_________________________
2011 Hyundai i30 1.4 CVVT Shell Helix Ultra 5w40
1997 Toyota Landcruiser KZJ95 3.0 TD various 10w40

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#4661079 - 02/09/18 02:57 PM Re: English language [Re: Kruse]
Collingwood Offline


Registered: 01/28/18
Posts: 38
Loc: Eastern Seaboard
Originally Posted By: Kruse
Originally Posted By: BalticBob

11. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.


I remember my grade school teacher saying this...back in the early 70s.


Same here! I still get people with that joke lol

Proper form: "Do you know what happens when the smog lifts in Los Angeles? U.C.L.A."

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#4661087 - 02/09/18 03:05 PM Re: English language [Re: Kamele0N]
Char Baby Offline


Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 10013
Loc: ROCHESTER, NY
Originally Posted By: Kamele0N
6th....? shrug


When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A....You see LA


Edited by Char Baby (02/09/18 03:06 PM)
_________________________
"Retired"
'80 Firebird FORMULA V8/4bbl-purchased "NEW"
'06 Mazda 3i 2.0L
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#4661184 - 02/09/18 05:08 PM Re: English language [Re: Kamele0N]
cjcride Offline


Registered: 11/06/09
Posts: 1814
Loc: Ontario Canada
Originally Posted By: Kamele0N
6th....? shrug
they take the bait. Like on a fish hook.

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#4661608 - 02/10/18 06:41 AM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
Kamele0N Offline


Registered: 02/09/15
Posts: 2037
Loc: Slovenia
Aaaa ok....its "pronounciation" thing smile tnx
_________________________
2011 Hyundai i30 1.4 CVVT Shell Helix Ultra 5w40
1997 Toyota Landcruiser KZJ95 3.0 TD various 10w40

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#4662229 - 02/10/18 06:37 PM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
Shannow Online   content


Registered: 12/12/02
Posts: 39821
Loc: 'Stralia
When I was a kid, my grandparents had an outside lavatory with a can...the can man would come weekly and pick it up.

When I was a teenager, it was reported that the can man had suffered a heart attack while walking along the trench at the sewage treatment plant.

He was found inturd.

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#4663268 - 02/11/18 06:38 PM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
Whitewolf Offline


Registered: 10/05/06
Posts: 2912
Loc: MI, USA
Joking apart the origin of some words is actually very interesting since they have origins from Scandinavia, France , India etc. Maybe it's worth a serious discussion sometime?
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My definition of an expert in any field is a person who knows enough about what's really going on to be scared.
~ PJ Plauger

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#4663909 - 02/12/18 01:00 PM Re: English language [Re: Whitewolf]
Kira Offline


Registered: 08/19/10
Posts: 5203
Loc: Champlain/Hudson Valley
It would be a long discussion as there are many words in many languages.

Did you know Dampier (explorer decades before Ctn. Cook) saw wall mounted fold down bunk beds somewhere in the western hemisphere.
The natives called them babacue, or some such.
Meat smokers used wall mounted fold down shelves and the word bar-B-que (sp?) developed.

I read a great book about Dampier.

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#4688498 - 03/08/18 09:14 AM Re: English language [Re: BalticBob]
Matagonka Offline


Registered: 02/03/15
Posts: 469
Loc: NC
Hahaha, #2 was the best.

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