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#4490998 - 08/17/17 12:18 PM Mowing Seinfeld Style
AirgunSavant Offline


Registered: 07/22/15
Posts: 3772
Loc: MD
To keep it oil related I was mowing with a 33 EFI Kohler with 2.7 quarts of fresh Napa FS 15W50 filtered through a test bed FL910s MC filter and some 89 octane Valero gas set off the torch smile

I hauled the mower via a Big Tex OS trailer hooked to a donated 2000 Chevy Blazer that has been a garage queen all of its life.
Once I got to my remote property I began to unload the mower and all the ladies in the minivans waived to me because they know I'm a great guy ( yeah-lol) plus they love to see some dude killing himself out in the heat. Frolickingly I unload the mower and as I prepare to mow I assure myself what a special guy I really am (choke-spit)

Feeling like Speed Racer I start to carve up the landscape at a high rate of speed with my free Sig Sauer black cap to retain the heat on my sweltering scalp and a pair of space aged $3 sunglasses with some cheap but effective ear plugs. A few hundred yards away the UPS man waives and toots his horn. Again, he too must know how great of a guy I am. Then within seconds I avoid a Leopard frog and soon after a few small water snakes that are cooling off in the water filled tire ruts. I take time to reassure myself again how special I am ( you know people really do this)

At this point I'm starting to tire as those 750 yard blasts of rough and tumble ground are starting to break up like cheap conventional oil in a rat powered Vespa. So I take some idle time to sit a few minutes to watch the train go by at the end of the property. It is a very long and slow freight train and after a few minutes I start to get cross-eyed and figure it is time to pedal on. I bring the 33 EFI back to life and tach it high sky so I can feel the power.. I then have renewed hope I can carry on and finish up the 30% remaining grass. A neighbor from several hundred yards away peeks his head around a garage and waives to me.
he knows I am the man and he admires how great I look on this machine...... ( In reality he is waiving and laughing on how stupid I am mowing my own lawn and I look like a prized horses A...... (grin),, )

Like Newman in the recycling scam episode I now know the end is near. I go to pat myself on the back but my Lyme ridden joints won't let me. ( but the crowd still loves me-not!) I envision loading up the trailer and going on to the next. Again another job almost well done. Did I mention how special I am? ( uh yeah)

Out of nowhere this dag gone Pit Bull shows up. I mean like there isn't anything around and I only have like 20 more minutes to go. He starts violently attacking the mower deck and I fear I'm going to hurt him and this is a big mower and one slip I could go over him. At this point I ain't no fan of him but I don't want to kill him either. He appears that he is now trying to get up in the seat with me as I continue to mow. A few times I have to kill the mower so I don't chew him up. I guess he realizes how unspecial I am now. This continues for over 20 minutes until the sucker sees two deer at the bottom of the hill and chases them. I hurry and blow through the rest so I can load the mower before he returns. What a fiasco.

All the nonsense aside this really happened this morning. What a pain in the arse................
I wonder if he realized how special I was?????????? ( yeah-not!)

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#4491045 - 08/17/17 12:55 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
pandus13 Online   content


Registered: 08/12/11
Posts: 3190
Loc: Chicago,IL,USA
You and GreeCGuy (where is he?) together, would have been something to talk about....

Next time bring some cheap tennis balls for the un-apreciative over-dimensioned doggy.

or a small bucket of extra spicy de-boned KFC

and change your shirt. It must be something with the pattern/color.....

Now how are the Walnuts jam/confiture doing?
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16 Golf SportWagen
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#4491054 - 08/17/17 01:12 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
Bud Offline


Registered: 06/04/02
Posts: 1716
Loc: Texas
We need a forum for "Stories". I hate this kind of stuff when I start reading thinking it is all about oil, then spray a mouthful of coffee on the computer when I start laughing. I am going to start sending OP the bill for cleanup. LOL
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#4491087 - 08/17/17 01:44 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: Bud]
pandus13 Online   content


Registered: 08/12/11
Posts: 3190
Loc: Chicago,IL,USA
Originally Posted By: Bud
We need a forum for "Stories". I hate this kind of stuff when I start reading thinking it is all about oil, then spray a mouthful of coffee on the computer when I start laughing. I am going to start sending OP the bill for cleanup. LOL

AAAWWW,

I get it!

Do not drink and type?
_________________________
16 Golf SportWagen
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08 Yaris
04 Elantra
95 accent
95 mystique
97 concorde

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#4491094 - 08/17/17 01:49 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
Merkava_4 Offline


Registered: 01/30/07
Posts: 17501
Loc: Clovis, CA
Originally Posted By: AirgunSavant
Out of nowhere this dag gone Pit Bull shows up.


That's the best part right there. LOL

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#4491223 - 08/17/17 04:11 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
eljefino Offline


Registered: 06/15/03
Posts: 32632
Loc: ME

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#4491232 - 08/17/17 04:16 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
dlundblad Offline


Registered: 09/30/13
Posts: 10021
Loc: Indiana
What Seinfeld episode is this referring to?

There's one where Newman gets chased by a bulldog named Buford.
_________________________
03 Jeep WJ 4.0 199k Castrol Edge 10w40 HM Fram XG16
02 Volvo S60 2.4T 177k M1 0w40 Mahle OX149D
97 Chevy Blazer 4.3 145k Rotella T5 10w30 Fram TG3980


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#4491296 - 08/17/17 05:38 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
Kamele0N Offline


Registered: 02/09/15
Posts: 2038
Loc: Slovenia
Originally Posted By: AirgunSavant


All the nonsense aside this really happened this morning. What a pain in the arse................
I wonder if he realized how special I was?????????? ( yeah-not!)



Did that Pit Bull waved at you at the end? smile
_________________________
2011 Hyundai i30 1.4 CVVT Shell Helix Ultra 5w40
1997 Toyota Landcruiser KZJ95 3.0 TD various 10w40

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#4491412 - 08/17/17 08:22 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
tomcat27 Offline


Registered: 06/25/09
Posts: 3564
Loc: Chicago, IL
all of this is under-rated without pictures
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#4491438 - 08/17/17 08:55 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
AVB Offline


Registered: 05/20/12
Posts: 1283
Loc: Georgia
LOL I can relate, I have a pitbull. I have to keep her in the house while I mow. She punctured the front tire on my mower right after I bought it. She is fine if I just sit on the mower, but as soon as I start to move she goes for the tires. Several years ago I went to visit my parents and took her with me. My dad had a old three wheeler that I was able to get running. I put my dog in the house and went for a test ride down the gravel road that they lived on. My mom let the dog out because she was watching out the upstairs window and howling as I left. When I got back and turned into their driveway my dog came running at me. First she went after the front tire, after that didn't work she started pulling on the leg of my pants.

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#4491733 - 08/18/17 09:19 AM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: tomcat27]
AirgunSavant Offline


Registered: 07/22/15
Posts: 3772
Loc: MD
Originally Posted By: tomcat27
all of this is under-rated without pictures




The Blazer was my fathers who passed 11/7/15
He never bought himself anything. He was a depression era child and the only thing important to him was a roof over our heads, food on the table, and hard labor. Work, eat, and sleep. This is the first ever vehicle he purchased new and he called it his Cadillac.
Yes it is a turd but he loved it and it helps me haul around my mower. This year I went all through it and put it in tip top shape.
My cars sit outside but I cleared my shop for a place for his little jewel....

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#4491927 - 08/18/17 01:14 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: AirgunSavant]
pandus13 Online   content


Registered: 08/12/11
Posts: 3190
Loc: Chicago,IL,USA
Originally Posted By: AirgunSavant
...My cars sit outside but I cleared my shop for a place for his little jewel....

When i didn't live in an apartment,
my car ('04 elantra) sit outside all winter to live space in a double garage for.....

kids play-house and a lot of bags of toys/plush toys...

Re: Your Dad
Having grow up in 80's Communist Eastern Europe, I could relate to his mindset.
My kids don't get any of the stories about me growing up walking 1.5 miles to school no matter what, and having rationed food on the table/power/gas.....
_________________________
16 Golf SportWagen
13 Mazda5
08 Yaris
04 Elantra
95 accent
95 mystique
97 concorde

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#4492115 - 08/18/17 05:22 PM Re: Mowing Seinfeld Style [Re: pandus13]
AirgunSavant Offline


Registered: 07/22/15
Posts: 3772
Loc: MD

I get you very well. And I fully respect those that have lived that kind of life. It builds character. I grew up very hard. Even though the depression was long gone I grew up as if it was just around the corner. My mother and father were both the youngest of 12 children. Thank you!


Originally Posted By: pandus13
Originally Posted By: AirgunSavant
...My cars sit outside but I cleared my shop for a place for his little jewel....

When i didn't live in an apartment,
my car ('04 elantra) sit outside all winter to live space in a double garage for.....

kids play-house and a lot of bags of toys/plush toys...

Re: Your Dad
Having grow up in 80's Communist Eastern Europe, I could relate to his mindset.
My kids don't get any of the stories about me growing up walking 1.5 miles to school no matter what, and having rationed food on the table/power/gas.....

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