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Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh #4470746
07/26/17 09:38 AM
07/26/17 09:38 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
motor_oil_madman Offline OP
motor_oil_madman  Offline OP
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
I know you guys probably don't care to hear about my dating life anymore, but hey I've given you guys a break for a while and this one is worth reading. So here it goes, I went and drove an hour to meet this girl I met online, she seemed super excited to see me but I don't think she realized I lived an hour away, nor do I think she looked at my pictures. I headed out and timed it perfectly to be about 10-15 minutes early, well halfway there she texts me saying hey can we bump the meet time back 30 minutes, I said fine. And thought to myself well I have 30 minutes to collect my thoughts once I get there, that's okay.

Fast forward and hour and she ends up being like 20 minutes late on top of that and I'm sitting there waiting for her inside the front doors at the restaurant, she finally comes in and takes one look at me and says, sorry hang on I forgot something in my car and I said to myself that's odd, but ok. Then two minutes later I get a text for her saying there is an emergency and her sister had just gotten into a wreck right down the road and she has to go check and make sure she's okay. I'm so sorry I'm not blowing you off. (yeah right) Having heard lines like this before and am familiar with girls having get out of date text emergencies, but usually they wait until the date starts.

I mean this girl really takes the cake, I thought the girl who I took to get an ice cream and go for a walk on the beach which was across the street, who had her mom text her saying her grandma fell, which I later called her out on that which ended up being a whole bunch of [censored] would be about as bad as it gets, but I was wrong. We weren't on the beach for 5 minutes. Then to have this other girl who takes one look at me at the restaurant and runs out the door??? I don't know what I do wrong...... So frustrating.

Can you believe this??? I suppose me spending 30 or 40 bucks on two meals and have her cancel would have been worse, but this is just a swift kick in the balls imo.




Last edited by motor_oil_madman; 07/26/17 09:39 AM.

2007.5 dodge cummins 6.7 liter. Chevron Delo400 15w40. 7000 mile or 250-300hr intervals.

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470754
07/26/17 09:45 AM
07/26/17 09:45 AM
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 165
Houston, TX
czbrian Offline
czbrian  Offline
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 165
Houston, TX
LOL. Are you sure your pictures are accurate and not just your best picture ever or something?

I actually met my wife on eharmony and one of my friends met his wife on there as well. I never had any terrible dates other than one where a girl clearly used a picture of either someone else or a much slimmer version of herself. I was at least nice about it instead of running away.

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470756
07/26/17 09:46 AM
07/26/17 09:46 AM
Joined: Apr 2017
Posts: 515
Fort Worth TX
TheKracken Offline
TheKracken  Offline
Joined: Apr 2017
Posts: 515
Fort Worth TX
How old are you? Just trying to get an idea of which dating scene you are in. Might have some advice.


2011 Prius 96k miles RLI 5w20
97 Toy T100 4x4: amsoil 0w20 242k Miles
04 Toy Sienna awd: Pennzoil 0w20 281k Miles
Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470757
07/26/17 09:47 AM
07/26/17 09:47 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
motor_oil_madman Offline OP
motor_oil_madman  Offline OP
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
Yeah I think they are. They aren't the best pictures, but you can get a good idea of my body build and everything if you actually take a good look.


2007.5 dodge cummins 6.7 liter. Chevron Delo400 15w40. 7000 mile or 250-300hr intervals.

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: TheKracken] #4470758
07/26/17 09:47 AM
07/26/17 09:47 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
motor_oil_madman Offline OP
motor_oil_madman  Offline OP
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
Originally Posted By: TheKracken
How old are you? Just trying to get an idea of which dating scene you are in. Might have some advice.


28


2007.5 dodge cummins 6.7 liter. Chevron Delo400 15w40. 7000 mile or 250-300hr intervals.

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470760
07/26/17 09:48 AM
07/26/17 09:48 AM
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 22,162
Colorado Springs
Drew99GT Offline
Drew99GT  Offline
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 22,162
Colorado Springs
At least you're weeding out the flakes! I mean, if a girl can't sit there and have a nice conversation over free dinner because she instantly doesn't like you, she's not the one... LOL She's probably not the one for anyone!

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: Drew99GT] #4470765
07/26/17 09:50 AM
07/26/17 09:50 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
motor_oil_madman Offline OP
motor_oil_madman  Offline OP
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 4,941
Houston, Texas
Originally Posted By: Drew99GT
At least you're weeding out the flakes! I mean, if a girl can't sit there and have a nice conversation over free dinner because she instantly doesn't like you, she's not the one... LOL She's probably not the one for anyone!


She said she was with a guy that was abusive and had a bad temper and finally left him 6 months ago, she needs to go back and get him before he moves on. lol I actually had a good feeling about her too and thought hey maybe i'll get a chance with one of those good girls who always stays with a bad guy.

Last edited by motor_oil_madman; 07/26/17 09:51 AM.

2007.5 dodge cummins 6.7 liter. Chevron Delo400 15w40. 7000 mile or 250-300hr intervals.

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470766
07/26/17 09:51 AM
07/26/17 09:51 AM
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 36,291
Great Lakes
Quattro Pete Offline
Quattro Pete  Offline
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 36,291
Great Lakes
Originally Posted By: motor_oil_madman
Can you believe this??? I suppose me spending 30 or 40 bucks on two meals and have her cancel would have been worse, but this is just a swift kick in the balls imo.

She did you a favor and saved you time and money. I think this is better than sitting through a couple of hours of uncomfortable dinner.

Yes, your ego may have gotten a little bruised, but really, I think it was for the best. Move onto the next. This was not meant to be.


'02 530i (Edge 0W-40)
'15 Q5 3.0T (Edge 5W-40)
'18 Charger SRT (FF)
Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470767
07/26/17 09:52 AM
07/26/17 09:52 AM
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 4,225
New England
Virtus_Probi Offline
Virtus_Probi  Offline
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 4,225
New England
Maybe it would worth doing a quick Skype before arranging a date to (sort of) meet face to face and avoid anybody being surprised in person?

I think that gal's actions were a bunch of "crud", but people like her are not hard to find. It wouldn't have killed her to have dinner with you, try to converse politely, and tell you later that she didn't think it was going to work out.


2014 Forester XT, 86000 miles
Last Change;
M1 5W30 d1G2
Tokyo Roki 15208AA170 filter
Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470769
07/26/17 09:53 AM
07/26/17 09:53 AM
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 165
Houston, TX
czbrian Offline
czbrian  Offline
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 165
Houston, TX
Originally Posted By: motor_oil_madman
Yeah I think they are. They aren't the best pictures, but you can get a good idea of my body build and everything if you actually take a good look.


It sounds like your pictures aren't accurate. You should have high definition clear pictures on your profile. Any iphone/samsung phone made in the last 3-4 years should be able to take a better picture than something that will simply "provide a good idea of your body build".

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470772
07/26/17 09:54 AM
07/26/17 09:54 AM
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 13,534
Chicago, IL
dparm Offline
dparm  Offline
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 13,534
Chicago, IL
Sorry to hear, man, but this is just part of the dating world. It's pretty [censored] of her to bail like that, I agree.


2017 Chevrolet Corvette Grand Sport
Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470773
07/26/17 09:55 AM
07/26/17 09:55 AM
Joined: May 2016
Posts: 120
Vienna, Austria
alex_at Offline
alex_at  Offline
Joined: May 2016
Posts: 120
Vienna, Austria
that's so rude ..... I'd rather have a girl telling me right in the face that I'm not the right one for her, that I'm not what she's lookin for or whatever. But those "excuses" are lame ...

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470775
07/26/17 09:56 AM
07/26/17 09:56 AM
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 27
Oklahoma
Arkandspark Offline
Arkandspark  Offline
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 27
Oklahoma
She sounds like a broken toy that's best left alone. I can't imagine trying to date in this day and age.

Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470777
07/26/17 09:57 AM
07/26/17 09:57 AM
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 4,225
New England
Virtus_Probi Offline
Virtus_Probi  Offline
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 4,225
New England
A guy I worked with went the "mail order bride" route and I figured that was going to be a big disaster.
They have been married for at least 25 years now and have a big pack of kids, seems like all involved are happy. They "met" through some channel involved with their church, guess it could only help to have common religious beliefs from the get go. As you might guess, this guy is a long way from a Brad Pitt but makes a good living and is a very devoted family man.


2014 Forester XT, 86000 miles
Last Change;
M1 5W30 d1G2
Tokyo Roki 15208AA170 filter
Re: Date canceled as soon as she saw me. smh [Re: motor_oil_madman] #4470783
07/26/17 10:03 AM
07/26/17 10:03 AM
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 1,981
Upper Midwest by the Lakes USA
SumpChump Offline
SumpChump  Offline
Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 1,981
Upper Midwest by the Lakes USA
Its her man, its not you. You seem like a good guy with a job, showered, not pompous or addicted to tanning (which here is WI is an indicator or pompousness fyi)

So either you start outright asking these girls "Have you really looked at my picture?" before dates as a sort of little initialled disclaimer similar to the no smoking in the car on a rental contract .... or.... you get off the WEB for a while.

I'm 20 years married to a great woman who get more handsome every year, and there is one thing I have learned....

SHE CHOOSES YOU

No workout routine, cologne, job, faith, restaurant, diamond is going to help you choose your eventual match. You have very little say in the choosing. In fact it is they who are essentially proposing to you by sticking around in a dating partnership. You being on bended knee is just a formality... the "yes this is going to happen" was decided by her long ago. Can you say no and end a relationship as a male?...sure! But, the choice to be an actual couple is the woman's.

So now knowing this, that the woman is actually the puppet master, you can be less stressed. If she doesn't want to even sit at that table, its her call, a totally rude one, but they have that much leverage. And with today's astronaut-entrepreneur-president-hero women (which IS awesome btw) .... thier attitude is even that much more confident.

Frankly with the raw intelligence of most women, I see men and manlyness and becoming more of eye candy in an increasingly strategic and cerebral world.

So go the natural route. Talk to a gal at the local grocery store, in a church group, in a mountain biking club. Find one "in the wild" and not on the net. The net is where people go to whimsically shop. Women already are in control of the relationship "shopping". So don't use the web which makes that mindset of theirs even worse.

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