Friends who take advantage of you for auto repair

[ryan2022]

Hi guys,

This is more of a vent than anything.

A "friend" of mine is asking me to do a full brake job on his wifes car, after writing off an entire weekend racking up close to 12-14 hours on his daughters car doing, brakes, tire rods, wheel cylinders, and a pile of other random work.

I told him my labor was free.....now, its like an open invite. He's actually pushed me to get this work done for him.

I told him that I could do the work on his wifes car and I'd had to charge him a small fee after that.

I'm the kind of guy that's always fixing things for people, kids bikes, cars and plumbing....This just doesn't feel right to me.

...I don't even know what I'm looking for....end rant. lol

 

[Mr Nice]

Don't offer your free services...

 

[RF Overlord]

Tell him you're not in the mechanic business...you don't mind doing smaller things or helping if it's a "situation", but otherwise don't let him take advantage of you.

 

[SatinSilver]

It's kind of like feeding stray cats, they keep coming back for more. Ask your friend to do a simple favor for you like wash your car, pick up and deliver a six pack of your favorite beer etc and see how he reacts. You can also go on www.repairpal.com to get some labor estimates to quote him. Some people have a "me, me" attitude or are takers rather than givers.

 

[901Memphis]

It's simple, stop doing it for free, give him a good price but make it worth your time.

 

[surfstar]

A friend in need...



My 'friend' like this, is my brother. I'll find a deal on parts for him, then I'm supposed to install them since he never learned to turn a wrench.

 

[ryan2022]

Thanks guys,

Yeah, it's a shame I've had to set a labor rate in stone, but I'm just bummed out.

In the end, it was my bad for doing it for free in the first place. I just don't get how someone could actually have the guts to push and keep asking for free service.....what the heck is wrong with people? lol

It's made me question our friendship....it's a shame.

 

[ryan2022]

It just seems to me, when it comes to favours (and I never excpect anything in return) there is an unwritten limit which most people have ingrained in them.

I don't understand someone that can just say WOW! Have I hit the jackpot and open the flood gates.

He IS buying me a new torque wrench at least....I should have asked for a snapon. lol

 

[Trav]

Don't do work for anyone for free, wife and kids sure but the rest of the family will clean you clock with free work even worse than friends, they have to pay.
You have to draw the line somewhere or you will working a second job for no money, it will ruin your family life going down that road.

Don't let them stiff you either, they always say I will get you later then conveniently forget leaving you feeling like the Ahole asking them for the money. Car stays here until you pay, like it or take it to a shop.
They will call you an Ahole but better that than being used as one. I went down this road 40 years ago, nip it in the bud.

 

[ryan2022]

I really thought it was common sense....This guy makes a TON of dough, his daughter is just heading to college and Im unemployed.

I did the work for her for free, because shes broke and got hit with a huge bill....This guy roles hard and doesn't suffer at all.....and Im out of work.

It just sucks.

I DID just accept a job last week though so that's good!

 

[Trav]

I didn't wake up till I did this a couple of years, every weekend was lost working for nothing.
Reals friends will understand, on the other hand don't screw a good friend that does things to help you either. My dentist and a good friend did work after hours for me, I never had a dental bill. I always kept his bike in good service in return. Use common sense.

 

[AlaskaMike]

I used to try to do all maintenance work on my parents' vehicles--they're in their late 70s and I want to look out for them.

Unfortunately, the first issue that came up suddenly became my fault. And it turns out I'd never touched the system that had the problem! (the brakes)

So at this point, all I do on their vehicles is swap out summer/winter tires. While I do inspect everything I can, I won't actually touch anything--I'll say, "hey Dad, looks like you have a cracked rotor. You should take that into the shop asap. Let me know if you need me to help drop it off."

I'd be very leery about the liability of working on a friend's vehicle. You may be perfectly confident you didn't screw something up, but as in my example above, the *perception* of having screwed up can also be a very big issue.

 

[JC1]

If you own a house and need some free labour ask this guy to come over to help. Work his butt off doing some hard manual work, and he'll probably never bug you again for your free labour.

 

[Bud]

Just learn how to say no. If saying no ticks your friend off, you do not need them as a friend. Too many folks let themselves be used.

 

[NormanBuntz]

Originally Posted By: ryan2022
I really thought it was common sense....This guy makes a TON of dough, his daughter is just heading to college and Im unemployed.


So this "friend" knows you were unemployed, and he still didn't offer to pay a few bucks? He may make a good living, but he's a low life. He needs to pay next time. How about $20 an hour, 1/5 of the average labor cost? He still gets a bargain.

 

[Ihatetochangeoil]

My 2 cents worth is that I would help a friend who asked me to help; but I'm not a charity donation. What skills does HE have that you don't? I would be flat out honest with the fellow and ask him to do something for me that takes an approximate equal amount of time; even if it is just a simple task like mowing your yard. My point is that true friends don't expect slave labor from their friends.

Years ago I had a friend who owned a small roofing company. I needed a new roof on my house. We discussed it beforehand. I traded him two dirt bikes and he furnished labor to install my roof. We were both happy and friends when done, and no money changed hands. Don't be afraid to barter; if a friendship is truly what you have, your buddy SHOULD feel indebted to you like "he owes you one" after you've spent a healthy amount of time doing something for him.

If he doesn't feel the same toward you, then you have discovered that he is not your friend, you're just slave labor. In that case, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...

 

[surfstar]

Originally Posted By: ryan2022

I did the work for her for free, because shes broke and got hit with a huge bill....This guy roles hard and doesn't suffer at all.....and Im out of work.



That's really weak. Don't touch his wife's car for less than $40 an hour.

 

[Mr Nice]

And you will be sued if anything goes wrong.

 

[skyactiv]

I'm a former Honda mechanic and am now a UPS semi mechanic. I don't mind helping out a friend, family member, neighbor or a member from my synagogue if the time spent is short and sweet. I have a sister with an old Camry that has over 200K I've done a lot of free labor for: Half-shafts, engine mount, brake line, oil changes, radio. I have a friend I help out and he will buy pizza and always let me plink/shoot on his land. A friend of a friend asked if I would help him swing in an engine on a Pontiac G6 V6 and I told him no.

 

[3800Series]

I dislike people like this, I'm the type who doesn't like to accept anything from anyone (not in the sense I feel I'm better then it) I just end up feeling indebted and I do not like that feeling.

I have this old high school friend who got into business management. Opened up a gas station did well, then opened up a store, etc until the point where he opened up his own reality business. He's a good friend and we have always had each other's back but he likes to ask a lot of favors.

My current job I make a good living and I'm not against helping a friend but he will call me first thing in the morning and ask me to mow one of his properties. I own a commercial mower and I don't mind helping and all I ask is just the gas to do it but it's gotten to the point where I get there spend 2 hours picking up limbs, weed eat, and mow for a few hours. If it was every now and then sure no problem but there is only so many times I'm going to drive 2 hours one way to spend 5 hours picking up and mowing a yard.