Increasing hostility on BITOG

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Hello:

There seems to be more and more confrontation and hostility here on BITOG, attitudes and comments that go beyond ordinary disagreement. Some threads have more back and forth rock throwing than actual discussion about the OP's original question. A rolling coal thread went so far off the rails it turned into an HOA rant. Bright headlights turned into baseball bat revenge and prison time. Really?

Yeah, the world is a messed up place right now. But we have this tiny little "nation of BITOG", all of us here because we share a mutual interest. And yet some of our "citizens" throw rocks at each other, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth until they get bored, wear themselves out, or give up in frustration. What does that accomplish?

I suspect that if all of us were able to meet at some gigantic BITOG member party, we'd have one heck of a good time. We'd meet the guy who likes thin oil and find him a nice guy. We'd meet the guy who likes thick oil and find him a good dude. We'd meet the Subaru or MB owner, often times the target of wrath here on BITOG, and enjoy a friendly conversation with them. The 20K OCI guys would meet the 3K OCI guys and laugh at some good jokes. We'd meet the user who we always assumed was a man, only to find out they're a woman! We might even meet the member we "hate", only to exchange a friendly handshake and wonder how we got it so wrong.

With respect to BITOG, why does a person allow themselves to get angry because of another person's post? You are giving that person great power over you. You are making yourself a victim!

Here's an idea. Instead of getting your blood pressure up, how about simply avoiding subjects that you know will anger you. Instead, engage in useful discussions, discussions that you can add actual value. You're not going to change someone else's viewpoints on life, and they're not going to change yours. Let the "antagonists" shout into the wind. They can't force you to listen. And with respect to the "antagonists", the ones in a perpetual bad mood, take a chill. You're wasting your time. I'm not listening.

Y'all have a nice day. Seriously.

Scott
 

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I'd say two things. First of all, when was the last time the world wasn't a messed up place? Secondly, more censorship and snowflakiness is not what we need. A mature, adult male should not be ruffled by an even very aggressive and ignorant disagreement online. I'm firmly for the right of most ignorant persons calling me moron even for my most intelligent argument. The alternative censorship is magnitudes worse
 
It's the Covid, man. I snapped at some people at a bar on Saturday and had to go and apologize to them for my outburst. I have a lot of negative energy and I don't want to release it at home. So, I can release a little on here. I'm sure others are in the same boat. Being anxious everyday because our daily routines are altered is not good for mental health.
 
The mods here all send PMs to members who are hostile, from time to time. The ask is always, "be cordial and if someone pokes you, just decline the invite to provide an emotional response." When someone continues to be a jerk, they are often asked to find their happiness elsewhere, as we do want BITOG to be a friendly place.
 
It's the Covid, man. I snapped at some people at a bar on Saturday and had to go and apologize to them for my outburst. I have a lot of negative energy and I don't want to release it at home. So, I can release a little on here. I'm sure others are in the same boat. Being anxious everyday because our daily routines are altered is not good for mental health.
Not good. :(
 
The townies with the XX,XXX 5-figures post counts that camp out here are the worst offenders. Some of them think and act like they own the place.
In a thread noting increasing hostility, you decide to add to that hostility by displaying your own hostility towards a group you’ve labeled “townies”?

How does posting your accusation help lower the hostility on BITOG?
 
I've noticed the increase in hostility at a lot of forums I frequent over the last few years. BITOG is actually one of the best at still being civil, and I'm glad the mods reign it in when it does start to get out of hand. A fishing message board I used to frequent has just gotten out of control with political bickering, personal attacks and whining. Friendly debate where facts are exchanged is one thing but I can't really tolerate the back and forth personal insults that have increased on some of the other forums.
 
The ol' Ignore button works great, especially on the new forum software. I recommend folks utilize it. 🤓
 
All kidding aside. I belong to some “forums” that more closely resemble a MMA bout. Forums by their nature are meeting places for for people who don’t agree on anything. I think it would be a disservice to BITOG to describe it as such. It’s informative, opinionated, and refreshingly entertaining. The “human” wild card can only be constrained to a certain degree. The MOD squad has a tough job. I think they do pretty good.
 
As others have stated BITOG is one of the least aggressive forums and the mods here do a great job of culling the chaff when needed. There are other forums that stay off the rails to the point where one can wonder if anyone is moderating it or if they have simply thrown up their hands.

By and large I think most here are civil, but there are a few here that seem to take pleasure in pounding on newbies or who have a major in arrogance with a double minor in superiority and feel the need to display it more often than they should.
 
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