what women really want

[Virtus_Probi]

A guy ran into an old buddy of his who had gone and had a sex change operation.
Struggling to make conversation with his altered friend, the guy asked the new gal how the procedure had gone.
"Most painful thing I could imagine, it was terrible."
The guy asked if it was the breast implants that had been so bad, that was not it. Removing the...member...? Nope. Well, the facial plastic surgery, or the rear end implants? No.
"Well, WHAT was so painful??"
"When they stuck a straw up my nose and sucked half my brains out."
;^)

 

[Trav]

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

 

[MolaKule]

Originally Posted By: Trav
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".


Must have been an Engineer.

 

[Virtus_Probi]

A guy goes out to a bar with a buddy and sees a just plain smoking hot woman there...she is so incredible that he just stares at her all night.
The gal notices the attention she is getting and gets a little ticked about it after a while. She finally decides to try to shame the guy into cutting it out or leaving...walks right up to his table, gets in his face, and purrs, "I can see that you like the merchandise. Tell you what, sport, $200 and I will do whatever you want. ANYTHING..."
The guy smiles, slowly pulls out his wallet, peels out two hundreds, stares deep into her eyes, and whispers...
"Paint my house..."