Schrödinger and Heisenberg

[hotwheels]

Heisenberg and Schrödinger get pulled over for speeding.
The cop asks Heisenberg "Do you know how fast you were going?"
Heisenberg replies, "No, but we know exactly where we are!"
The officer looks at him confused and says "you were going 108 miles per hour!"
Heisenberg throws his arms up and cries, "Great! Now we're lost!"
The officer looks over the car and asks Schrödinger if the two men have anything in the trunk.
"A cat," Schrödinger replies.
The cop opens the trunk and yells "Hey! This cat is dead."
Schrödinger angrily replies, "Well he is now."

 

[salv]

Hahaha. Nice.

 

[tomcat27]

I tried that once with a LEO: there's a body in the trunk - but its alive as long as you don't open it...

 

[MolaKule]

"Heisenberg couldn't find his way out of a Quantum Well!"

 

[Shannow]

Love it.

A long time ago, in a period of work frustration, I dymoed "Schrodinger Heisenberg approvals box" on a box on my desk.

Made a point of putting a document in it in front of my line manager at the time, and he asked me what I was doing. I pointed out that there was, in theory a chance at least that it would emerge from the box signed...better than offering it up the chain.

 

[hotwheels]

"Captain, a vessel is approaching on the starboard bow."
"Can you make out her name?"
"It's the Heisenberg, captain."
"Are you certain?"

hotwheels

 

[hotwheels]

Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?

When they find the position they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum they can't find the position.

hotwheels

 

[MolaKule]

Originally Posted By: hotwheels
Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?

When they find the position they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum they can't find the position.

hotwheels

Excellent, I have to keep that one!